Pressure to Have the "Perfect Birth"

[Smoke Jaguar]

FWIW, I do not believe that labour is the best time to be 'playing it by ear', for mother or baby. A well-thought out plan is critical to having your wishes and philosophies considered (even if they cannot be adhered to down to the letter, if you've discussed your learning and beliefs with your caregivers, they will accord you respect according to those things when it comes down to the wire) otherwise it is THEIR agenda they will follow and their agenda becomes your agenda by default, if you outline nothing else for them. Find out what their agenda is, what their policies are in each eventuality before you decide that you are happy for their agenda to be yours, is my ultimate recommendation for women who think they want to 'go with the flow'. 'The flow' is often, in these cases, not to flow of the mother, but that of the hospital - conditional upon tailored policy, funding (which influences behind-the-scenes decisions and facilities), bed availability, practitioner availability, etc). Going with 'the flow' is very much like an open cheque, as I've said before...your cheque, not theirs. Decisions are made with the best interests of the hospital right up there with the best interests of the mother (and I'm being generous here!). If you 'go with the flow', please know what it means - a new baby requires all the energy that regret can use up. You don't always have to learn by your own mistakes - you are allowed to learn from others'
Being 'empowered' is not a fashion statement (I really don't know about the 'pressure for perfect birth' fashionability, I must be out of that loop!), it's a recommendation that contributes to higher levels of wellbeing for mother and baby. That's how I see it, and that's where I'm coming from in all of this. In my own social circles, 'empowerment' is definitely not the fashionable thing, 'going with the flow' is - however, in my booby and birth circles (that I found after DS was born) it's the opposite, thank goodness, so I have great support for next time round