Pregnancy after Long Term TTC #1 - 2009

[Nicole S]

Yeah the what if's would be just as bad BG.
Glad to hear things settled down for you and hope you and DH spend some quality time together over the break.

I must say today is my first day where I have woken up fearful for anything and everything to happen.
DH parents invited us away this weekend as they are down the south coast but seeing accidents on the news last night and your near miss BG, and all the other scary thoughts of being away from home got the better of me and DH and I decided it would be best to stay home.
I even made DH bring down my bag this morning and started sorting out some stuff to pack for the hospital although have no idea what size to pack for bubs.
I'm sure every PG women must feel this way coming to the end of her pregnancy, but I just can't shake this strange feeling I have.
If bubs is born soon am sure all will be ok, but I would hate to go this early and hope to keep cooking till at least 37 weeks.

Sorry for the rant

[briggsy's girl]

i'm hanging out for 37weeks too - but the countdown is on til Sunday next week - there should be no need for going to the city if she waits til then (unless she is sick, which we can't predict!). it is very scary thinking about the what if's from the other day, and it's been messing with my sleep more than normal. keep waking up through the night in tears - either from nightmares, or cos i'm in pain in my pelvis! poor DH - apparently i'm sobbing and groaning in my sleep a bit too - i think that's mostly from the pain though - my pelvis is very painful at the moment!

am off to the shops today - pick up layby with baby change station (she has one in her room, but the one on layby is one for down this end of the house, with bath and everything in it) and then layby some flat nappies, normal wraps (all ours are either summer weight or too "pretty" for using at the hospital - i'm paranoid about gifts going missing!) and nappy buckets. do the grocery shopping - then come home and relax while DH does some stuff around the house. i think i might sit on my bed and work out what we need to take with us to the hospital, what is left to get etc. i want to be ready, but i feel like it's not going to happen - it's just too damn hard to feel prepared for this!

Ob appt on Tuesday morning - going to talk to Ob about baby size, hospital "protocol" re progression of labour etc. i need to know what i'm facing. i also have a problem with my heart (persistent tachycardia) that may or may not be impacted by labour and i want to know what monitoring will exist for ME as well as bubba kwim?

[Nicole S]

Sounds like a very busy day for you BG!!
What change station are you getting?? I have looked at ones with baths as well and am at a loss.

[briggsy's girl]

we're getting one from target - it was down from 169 to 109 a little while ago.

we looked at the cost of a bath, plus the change mat for on the drawers we have, and it wasn't going to be that much less than the 109 we're paying - plus it gives us storage out in the lounge area. i wasn't planning on having anything down here apart from the bath,but once i thought about it more, i think having nappies down here is a good idea - it's the warmest part of the house during winter and it means i don't have to worry about keeping Gremlin's room warm until she moves in there (she'll be in our room for at least the first few months of her life!). will post piccies when i assemble it later tonight. the option of seperate bath and change station just didn't sit well with me - IF i have to have a c.s, i need everything to be convenient for ME - and this puts the bath on wheels etc...

[Nicole S]

Totally agree, we bought the Boori Matilda Chest which is in bubs room but I also wanted a seperate change table and bath if I went down the CS path.

Another question for you, do you know anywhere on the net I can find a blood pressure chart??

[briggsy's girl]

nope sorry!

i know if the lower number is above 90 it's deemed "high" and shouldbe monitored in pg (they aremore concerned with the bottom number than the top apparently) - anything over 145 is high for the upper number i believe

[Nicole S]

Cool, thanks for that
Have fun shopping.....

[Murph01]

Hi girls,
just letting you know you're not alone in here, although it is so quiet with everyone away. Just wanted to say, BG, I hope you are feeling better after your very scary near miss. I guess some of that is coming out in your dreams as well as the pain of your pelvis. Glad you are getting some benefit from some retail therapy.

Hi Nicole, I'm nowhere up to your stage but it's fun allowing myself to look at where you are and imagine. I know you're not having much fun with the stress of being prepared but I guess once all your ducks are in a line you will feel more at ease. It's really just being a good boy scout. Wise decision not to travel. I don't watch telly and I sooo don't miss news, but I hate being on the roads at these times. I live over the Daintree River in north queensland and travel to Cairns for uni and it's just tourist season and drunk drivers up here all the time. We have a gorgeous windy coastal highway with spectacular views but there is always someone reported in the paper as rounding a bend on the wrong side, flipping over, going over the range, it's just ridiculous. Statistically, these things happen every holiday season, so it makes sense to remove yourself from it sometimes.

21, arrggh! I can't believe your foul luck. You both must have been spewing but i guess not much you can do about it. dont worry about looking silly, there are lots of good people in the world too remember, not just the shonky ones and I'm sure you'll be in good hands if you have to ask for help choosing a tyre. Good luck with your studies too.

Well I have gorgeous weather for hanging out at home writing an essay. It's pouring and everything is green. My DH has given himself a weekend (practically unheard of as we live and work up here in the rainforest..tough gig but like anything, it has its limits).

9 weeks today, little milestone that we celebrated with early choccies. Have a great easter everyone.

[briggsy's girl]

murph, the small milestones are the best way to survive these scary pregnancies - it's so full on thta you can't live for huge milestones, just the little ones. mine, at the moment, is sunday next week - i'll be 34 weeks - 34 weeks, i can give birth locally - woot! when i was nice and early, it was living from appt to appt, work day to work day - and rewarding myself when i survived the gaps as they got bigger!

shopping was a nightmare - but i think i survived (just) - my 8 year old niece stayed last night and she helped DH and I with the shopping - she was a huge help - and a fantastic distraction when the pelvic pain got bad enough to have me doubled over. she's now back here for another night (normally one night is the limit, but she's here til tomorrow night cos she's been so good! she's planning on helping dh to cook tonight and tomorrow during the day to build up a food stash in the freezer again. she's been so well behaved - it's gorgeous. she is hanging out for the birth of this bubba - i don't think i'll get rid of her once Gremlin arrives!

Nicole - i should have the change station set up later today - just need to give my pelvis a break for a while first! will upload pics as soon as i do though! oh, i have the mathilda chest too and worked out the logistics of changing in that room, for now at least, just aren't workable so i'll have stuff sitting on top (at the moment, it's all her easter teddies that she got from the family lol)

[Nicole S]

Totally agree with BG Murph, the mini milestones are the best ones to keep the time moving...and congrats on hitting 9 weeks
My new weeks falls on a Wednesday and they can't roll around fast enough!!
It sounds so beautiful where you live, bubs is going to be very lucky!!

BG, you niece is too sweet and sounds like someone will be a real helper when Gremlin arrives.
Glad to hear that you survived shopping, and you take care of that pelvis of yours.

AFM, finally finished cleaning out my wardrobe today and it feels great.
I really think this nesting has really started to hit in as I am at least getting rid of 2 bags a week min although I am not a real hoarder so have no idea where all this stuff came from.
Also packed June Bug's draws today although nothing is washed but stacking those Huggies New born nappies was such fun they are soooooo small!!

[grub17]

oh murph! you are making me homesick!! i'm an fnq girl (tablelands) but live a looonnnggg way away now and i miss my green mountains. I really didn't realise how much i miss mountains - proper mountains - until i fly into cairns and nearly cry! lol.

but the small milestones is a great thought. I have been hanging out for Monday cos i'm 5 wks and i think i'll adopt the small steps mantra for awhile.

I did cave and buy "what to expect when you are expecting'' and a pregnancy magazine. I'm just so excited. I want to hold back "just in case" but part of me says "to hell with that, be excited and enjoy it''. so i'm trying to find a middle ground.

it's just so early, despite my high numbers i'm still a little stressed out over the "what ifs'' of the next few weeks. but dh and i are 28, fit, don't drink, don't smoke, i've cut caffine right down and am eating all those good baby growing foods and still exercising (imagiining lots of oxygenated blood going to embie as i run) so don't think i could do any more.

bg, i read your post in the boohoo room and couldn't respond cos i was so mad for you. what an absolute idiot. hope it all goes smoother for you now. enjoy your easter.

21 - how annoying for you! there is nothing worse than finding out you've been jibbed. hugs for you love.

what have the girls further along bought (Nicole/bg et al)? there was a page in teh magazine i read about ''what you need" and by the looks its another house to fit all the crap! seriously, i've been so focussed on IVF i have never actually thought what having a baby entails... i'd love to hear what others have bought and why they made that particular choice... oh and when did you start???

we won't be doing anything till at least 12-16 weeks but sounds like i need to start saving lol.

I've been tiredererer the last 2 days and have used the easter break well... napping. lol. did a walk/jog with the dog yesterday and a 3k slow jog early this morning while it was cool. felt good afterwards. so far, just cruising along and telling embie to stick and grow and stay put for 8 more months.

oxox

[briggsy's girl]

what HAVEN'T we bought lol

ok - essentials - somewhere for baby to sleep. decide sooner rather than later on what cot you want - some are easy to get - ours took 3 months to get in (and i think nicole will be in a similar situation). scope out some of the threads to see what you might like and google google google! i chose boori - it matches the rest of our furniture. the price was more than i expected, but cot becomes a toddler bed then a couch so can be used for a long time... we also got an amby baby hammock - i have terrible reflux, my bro's kids all had it to a degree - so i'm thinking ahead. i also like the look of them over a basinette

what iwll you keep babies clothes in? - if you have ample storage room, you may want to just look for a baby change station - if not, look at stations that have drawers etc so that you can fit everything in. make sure, before you set your heart on anything, that you KNOW it will fit though

ummm, i have two different play mats for Gremlin - a big (and fairly portable one) and a smaller one. i picked one, DH the other. i know how much my bro's kids got from their activity centres when young. i will also be out and about a fair bit due to living so far out of town, so i have had to, in some cases, buy two of things so that one can go with me to mum's/sil's

we have a vibrating rocker and a rocking swing - and i'll just throw in here that i've not paid full price for ANYTHING in terms of baby furniture and toys! i will essentially be a single mum a lot of the time so i have to have things to help me with entertainment for a few minutes here and there while DH isn't home. my neighbours aren't nice people i could ask to help for a five minute reprieve. i was advised the swing was a life saver (by friends that have them) and the rocker was a bargain cos it was end of line stock (paid less than half price) - DH wants a portable one for taking outside (my gardening guru and his little gardening goddess apparently)

pick your pram and travel arrangements - will you have a newborn to toddler car seat, or do you want a capsule? if choosing capsule, will you hire or buy? we decided to buy a capsule and travel system (the pram etc that the capsule fits into) - again, cos most of my trips will be a decent length and i hate disturbing a sleeping bub! we did buy a newborn to toddler car seat as well - price was similar, and i've read a lot about keeping baby rearward facing as long as possible and you can only use capsule up to a certain weight/length...

ummm - if you're planning on "wearing" your baby, have a look at wrap style carriers and mei-tais/slings etc. they are exxy, won't deny that - but if you spread your purchases over an entire pregnancy, you don't notice. i have a hugabub and it is soo comfy when on (well, it is without a bubba in it so i know it will be with her in there) and also a meitai. am apparently being sent a sling

baby bath - work out your plan of attack. for me (and i guess from what nic has said) i've planned on a "what if i have a c/s" theory. as i mentioned, DH is away a lot with work, so i have to plan for the simplest for ME for everything. as a result, we've gotten a baby bath on a wheelie stand (i WILL post pics later nic - DH left it in the car!) with nappy change mat on top (so you take baby out, throw cover over the bath, dry and dress baby on the same spot. i chose this because it's at the right height for me to not have to lean down. if i do have a caeser, i don't want to find myself bathing Gremlin in the big bath when she's a month old, DH 1000k's or more away, nearest "genuine" help (ie mum, bro) 20minutes away, and me stranded on the floor cos i can't get back up from using the bath! if you have a DH that will be around all the time when you're bathing, you might just want a little baby stand to put in your bath (cheaper etc).

if you're going to use disposables start looking for specials now. if you're planning on using cloth, start looking for specials now and reading the cloth nappy threads - there is so much out there that i just wasn't aware of in the world of modern cloth. they are again a little exxy - but some will fit from birth to toilet training so if you pay 40 for one nappy, and it lasts 2.5plus years...

decide on nursery theme (if you'll have one) and start looking for bargains to "furnish" it bedding wise. we are having a stars theme and we layby'd first stuff after 6 week scan - we didn't pick it up til after 12 weeks scan though. our theory was "we're pregnant, we've seen our baby, we can't live like it won't happen we have to embrace it".

dont rely on your baby shower for the essential stuff (if you're having a baby shower that is) - plan around it. if you have your baby shower at 30 weeks, sure, hold off buying things (wraps, singlets etc) - the stereotypical gifts - but have a budget to pay for them afterwards if you don't get "normal" stuff - we got nothing like what i was told to expect - all AWESOME and gorgeous stuff - but we're now chasing our tails working out what we still NEED (can you believe, from two baby showers, we got only 5 singlets lol)


my NUMBER ONE suggestion is to work out a "dream" list - everything you WANT for your bubba. then a "minimum" essentials list. work out a budget between yourself and DH and then work out what you'll get. your dream cot may be a Boori sleigh cot with matching chest of drawers, and toy boxes, but your budget may only stretch to a kingparrot cot and matching accessories (kingparrot are boori under a more budget friendly/less "fancy" guise - they do a more simple style but same quality) or may even be that you decide to go to target or kmart. but plan in advance - no point thinking "yup, let's order this" and then find you can't afford it... also, shop around - you'd be surprised, in some ways ordering in bulk from online baby stores who offer bulk discount (even if you have to pay big postage) is still cheaper than going to a baby shop. thankfully we didn't have that drama (i got an amazing sales person on the phone when i called baby bunting to order stuff - we live 2 hours from the shop) - but definitely email and get quotes now!

hope that helps - must away. am rather sleepy from a big day out and just thinking of curling up on the couch while DH and my niece stew some apples for dessert. gotta love listening to the two of them bicker "don't cut like this, do it this way" "yeah,but the knife isn't sharp enough to do it like that" " well get a different bloody knife" lol

[grub17]

AAARRRGGGGGHHHHH! that is the scariest thing i've ever read. omg! i'm going to have to print your list out.

Thanks so much for that. certainly gives me somewhere to start and some serious things to think about.

unfortunately, we are in the defence force, so no decorating for me as we are in one of their properties and we'll have to pack up and move, perhaps only a few weeks after bubs is born (obviously will be trying to avoid that one), so i'm going to have a very good think about what we buy and how much. And that also rules out baby shower unless i can get home to fnq , which i doubt, so at least we'll have that control.

but again, thanks so much for the advice. i'll certainly be rereading your post when we get further down the track.

ox

[briggsy's girl]

it does get scarier when you think about the other essentials (clothes etc) and what extra stuff you need for YOU (mat bras, mat clothes unless you're lucky like me - i'm 33 weeks and have lost more than i've put on!) - if you're wary about starting baby shopping too early, start researching stuff for yourself and saving to faves or at least noting where you found them - will you use cloth or disposable breast pads? if cloth, look around ( a few mpm's have them cheap esp when they are clearing stuff - keep an eye out for sales Maz has - others have them all the time). if disposable, research the brands - some are a lot better than others...

[Nicole S]

Well I think BG has summed it up for you perfectly Grub

We didn't layby any of the big furniture items until our 19 week scan, so best advice I could give is start saving $$$$.
Check out sales when they are on but I don't think it is necessary to jump to the first sale you see at Target or some of these other major outlets, they have had soooo many sales in the time I have been pregnant.
Another suggestion for yourself and not bubs in the clothing department is wait till you need maternity cloths and try and get away with larger or looser cloths if you can.
I think I went overboard and bought way too much and have even returned a heaps of tops that I "thought" I would need. So far my belly is all out front and nothing as big as I thought I would be so keep those tags on for anything you buy and keep the receipts.

Enjoy dreaming of all the things you like I would even suggest picking up a Babies Galore Catalogue not that you have to buy from there (rip off) but at least you can read up on different brands.
They also have a check list that may also help.

Have fun

[Nicole S]

what have the girls further along bought (Nicole/bg et al)?

BTW, BG we are the further along ones as Grub mentions...how funny as there was always so many others before us.

Thanks Grub, I just thought your comment was very sweet and put a big smile on my face

[grub17]

thnks girls. and the advice about the maternity clothes is really helpful too.

how is everyone feeling today???

i'm worried about ''bad things'', but for no particular reason. my boobs are hardly sore and everyone elses' seem to be out of control at this stage. but trying to remember everyone is differnt. feel a little nauseous, been on ginger tablets which have really really helped. but kind of like to "feel it'' so i can be sure it's real iykwim? it's just so early and i only found out not even a week ago, but i feel like i've been utd for ages, lol! must be all that full stim cycle of needles and bt and such that makes it feel much longer.

[briggsy's girl]

Grub - DON'T wish to feel more than you are - it is the worst thing i did. i was such a stress head and just needed to feel something - 29.5weeks from the start of MS and i'm STILL suffering!! my boobs were sore but not all the time - it really does come down to what is happening in them at the time - they're much worse now than they were back then - so keep in mind that what you may not feel a lot now but it is likely to get a whole lot more painful (i'm pretty sure i've been laying down milk ducts and stuff for a while now - but OMG the last maybe 3 weeks - youchies!). MS is reassuring, as is boob pain - but it isnt' the be all and end all. having been so sick for so long, i'd give anything to have a symptom free pregnancy to be honest!

be prepared you may need to buy a new bra (or three) early on as well as late in pregnancy - i would have been a mess without wire free bras very early on (i had to order my first at 5.5 weeks!) - i went up a cup size really early, and have almost gone up a second, but not quite (i have an extra one ready for when milk comes in!) - they were my first (and so far best) purchase. if you already wear wire free bras, you might be ok, but if you don't, keep in mind that the wires can impact milk duct development or add to your pain when they come. some people can go without swapping bras til later but it's advisable to not use wired bras from early on



you can scope out babies galore, baby bunting and toys r us online - toys r us have an awesome catalogue with everything in it - but i think it costs about $4 and not sure if you have one locally. i perused the catalogue looking for "maybe" stuff to get. ended up getting my rocker/glider from there as it was on special really cheap. it is divine and probably one luxury i'm glad we got it - can see me spending many nights snuggled in there with a sleepy bubba!

Nic, i have assembled the bath stand now - will get pics later. have just put Gremlins towels in for their first prewash - it's all so exciting - but also really weird! i keep thinking "yup, only this stuff left to prewash" and then i realised how much i HATE using towels on me that have only been washed and dried once so i can't do that to her - her towels will have to be washed at least a couple of times to get them fairly absorbant before she arrives! mum has, very kindly, washed almost all her clothes (we picked some up off layby yesterday that i'll wash) - which has helped heaps. i was upset at having to let her do it (you only have your first baby once!) but with the pelvic pain and stuff, i need DH to move everything for me once it's washed and he's just not home enough. i HAVE been going to mum's to help her out though which makes me feel a little better i guess...

BTW, BG we are the further along ones as Grub mentions...how funny as there was always so many others before us.

Thanks Grub, I just thought your comment was very sweet and put a big smile on my face

definitely made me smile too nic - but at the same time - can i stay in denial land just a little bit longer??? lay in bed with DH this morning, Gremlin going mental in my belly, and both of us unable to actually put into words how it will only be a couple of months and we'll be parents and no more layins without a bubba keeping us company!

jobs for today - so that i can't avoid them!
- dry towels
- rewash nappies and pre wash last load of girlie nappies
- set up rocker and swing (not important for us to have it done now, but they're being stored in a big plastic tub DH needs so that he can empty Gremlins wardrobe of 28 years of his accumulated stuff - gotta love moving into the house his folks built when he was 15!)
- move open robe from our room and set up hammock
- get mum to drop Gremlin linen off at bro's house so he can bring it out and SIL and I can put the cot together properly with linen tonight
- cook roast dinner for bro and sil
- make some meals for the freezer
- REST! (this is the important one - and the one i forget most often! lol)

33 weeks today!!! woot!