Pregnancy after Long Term TTC - June 2008

[Devon]

Hi everyone

Thankyou all for your warm welcomes.

Sorry, I think it's going to take me a while to get used to posting in here. I still don't feel like it's really happening and almost feel like talking about it will jinx it.

NT scan tomorrow. Not too anxious (considering), trying just to hang on and hope that all will be OK.

Scooby - best of luck for your scan tomorrow too! Looking forward to hearing that it all went well.

Bellyrubs to the pg girls, and congratulations to the new mums!

Devon
xxxx

[scooby]

Hi everyone
NIc: Huge congrat thats great, glad to hear you are both doing well
Devon: thanks and good luck to you too
Missc: how are you going, hope alls well and no more scares, think youve had enough for this pregnancy!!!
Well still not sure what to do with nana, DH is coming to the 20 week scan and im only allowed one person, hence why i picked this one for nana, thinkning i might ask her to come and sit in the waiting area with DS and if all good then ill call her in. BUT i have had some very light streaky brown spotting and very crampy ( but i did spend the day walking around the city) went to the gp last night but of course he had no equipment to check anything so i still dont know whats going on and i dont want to bug my ob again if its nothing. It so light that if i wasnt doing my normal toilet paper check i would have missed it, anyone else have this? I am so sick of freaking out, i really just want to enjoy this its making me very sad !!! I felt so great yesterday morning as i had hit the big 12 weeks and then by last night i was right back down again, poor DH any ways.
Hi to everyone hope you are all keeping happy and healthy

[JBM]

scooby i had some blood with first child. " freaked out", but all was ok and it is common for some spotting 1st trimester. hope you have a better day and all is ok. hugs to you.xxoo

[scooby]

thanks JBM i just read the BB thing on bleeding and i would have been due AF yesterday so hopefully its related to that. Feel im turning into to a hypochondriac !!!! Thanks again for looking out for me and i hope you are keeping well (hugs)

[Lenny]

Missy - I know you aren't in here much, but good luck Missy - and i LOVE the name you've picked

Marcellus - how do you cope without the washing machine - Liam is an enviromental disaster! He goes through clothes like it's a joke, and then he spews on me too, and in the bed and on the floor, the couch - everywhere! We bought a brand new front loader, and i'm so glad we did, they use such a lot less water!

Good luck with the scan scooby, and for yours tomorrow Devon. Reality will sink in soon, and I hope you have a great pregnancy.

Best wishes to all
Jo

[Devon]

Scooby - arg, why can't things just be simple! I had very light brown-tinged CM on several occasions earlier on, and everything seemed to be fine after that. I feel a bit crampy sometimes too. But why can't our bodies make this easy on us? Sorry to hear you're feeling sad again, just gotta hang on until tomorrow. Have you got a morning scan or an afternoon one? Absolutely everything for you hun.

Thanks Jo!

Called to confirm my scan, thought it was a transvaginal ultrasound, but it's abdominal - that's a bonus I guess.

xxxx

[Shannon22]

Hi Ladies

Just a quick one we had our 19 week scan yesterday and babies are great!

We are expecting a and a and are very excited!

The little girl is measuring on the small side but nothing to be concerned about apparently.

Shan

[Janie71]

Hi Shannon - I just wanted to drop in and say a huge congratulations!

How wonderful having one of each... it is just PERFECT!

Janie xxx

[Lenny]

That's great Shannon - big congrats on the and

[mako]

Scooby All the best for your scan sweety. Have you had any more cramping or spotting? Please don't feel like a hypercondriact(sp). Its only natural for us LTTTCers to worry about all these things

Shannon Great news about a and a How exciting for you guys.

Devon All the best for your scan too. Just wanted to say that I had both abdo and internal scans for my 12 week one just so the sonographer could have a better look that everything was ok. I only wanted to tell you incase your sonographer wants to do the same

Nic Once again congratulations on the arrival of Luke.

[Acacia]

Hi everyone

Shannon - *still* buzzing after your news, hun! So very pleased for you, B&S and DH. Yay!

Scooby - hope you're doing ok, hun. I know how scary spotting can be, and how sad it can make you feel just when you felt like everything was going ok and you're feeling in a place to start enjoying things. Like Lenny has said, you're not being a hypochondriac, you're simply reacting the completely normal way for someone going through what you are. You need to keep heart that it still is more than likely ok, even though it's hard not to get affected by it. Even after my threatened miscarriage, I still had both brown and pink spotting on and off for many weeks, but the whole time the baby was fine. And it's certainly not uncommon for woman to get some "breakthrough" bleeding around the time of when AF is due at 8 and 12 weeks, and it's that time for you at the moment, so this could be a likely explanation. I hope everything on the scan is able to reassure you, and I'm thinking of you heaps, hun.

Devon - hey hun. Thinking of you lots for you scan tomorrow too, hope you're having a relatively relaxing night and getting some shut-eye. Look forward to hearing how things are going for you and bubs next.

Lenny & mako and any other mums and mums-to-be in the thread. Hope you're all doing well.


AFM: chugging along ok. DH still hasn't got a job (he just had an interview we went to in Wales a few days ago that didn't turn out) - he keeps getting told he's second or third choice each interview he goes to which is quite frustrating, but he has another 4 interviews between now and next Thursday and he's had 5 so far, so hoping as he gets more experience and knowledge, something will click into place, hopefully with this bunch!

I'm already hanging out for my 20 week scan (which is still almost 4 weeks away!) so hopefully if DH gets a job soon that will be a good distraction whilst we move and try and set up our new home! I think I may have been feeling movement, but it seems a little to surreal to be happening, and because of my bowel problems it's difficult to tell if it's associated with my bowel or not even though it feels different, so I'm not entirely convinced that's what it is despite reassurances that it probably is.

One thing that took me by surprise a couple of nights ago is that my BBs are already leaking slightly! It happens in the evening at bedtime and unbeknownst to me, in my sleep as well! Wondering if anyone knows if this is a good thing or a bad thing? I've heard mixed things, including my mother telling me that it's not good to be leaking so early, as she did the same, and ending up having a stressful time BFing because she had too much gushing, watery milk. Not sure what to think at the moment. Ahh, I'm sure it will all work out. Trying not to stress about anything else now!

Hugs to you all,

Miss C

[Devon]

Hey everyone

Scooby - I hope your scan went well, I can't wait to hear that everything is OK with you and bub. Got everything crossed for you hun

Shannon - a boy and a girl - how fabulous! Huge congratulations, that must be so exciting!

Mako - thanks for that info. Just ended up being abdominal, which was good! Not that I'm too fussed by transvaginal anyway, I've had so many of them.

Missc - how exciting that you might be feeling movement already. Amazing that you're starting to make milk as well, that's full on! I'm sure it'll all work out - I bet it's just one of those things that happens early for some and later for others and might have nothing to do with how you will BF.

AFM - Nuchal scan went brilliantly, I am so relieved. All looks good, baby is slightly ahead of dates. nuchal fold measurement was 1.1mm and our risk for Downs was 1:7808. Am going to try to relax now. Sonographer said risk of m/c now is about 1 in 500, so I really should let that one go. Oh and placenta is at the front, so might take longer for me to feel movement. We have some really creepy pictures - it looks like an alien! There's one of it staring straight at us with its big alien eyes, and apparently giving us the finger - nice!

Devon
xxxx

[scooby]

Sorry runnin out the door but just wanted to let you all know it was all good today (thank god) placenta is low and there is some blood pooled behind it which is causing the spotting, but nothin to be worried about yeah!!!!! i will come on later to do some personals. thanks again for all the wonderful support and good wishes. Devon that is an awesome result for you too!!!! ITS REALLY HAPPENING ARRRRGGGGG!!!!!! talk soon

[butterfly_warrior]

So much to catch up on because I've been decidedly antisocial lately!

Miss C, I hope a job comes through for DH very soon.

Shannon, a girl and a boy sounds absolutely delightful! I can't wait until we can find out what we've got here.

Devon, I thought our little one was rude and uncooperative during the nuchal scan, but to be giving the finger so early, sheesh! I hope it's not a sign of things to come, but it is great that we can find things to laugh at as we go through this.

Scooby, glad to hear of a good scan result and that the spotting isn't anything to worry about. I've heard that spotting is quite common with low-lying placentas, but I don't know how true it is.

It's been a hard few days for me. I realised that the EDD for angel number 2 passed earlier this month, and I didn't even notice. Couple that with the anniversary of when we lost angel number 1 yesterday and I've been feeling almost guilty for being pregnant and starting to become happy and excited about it. I'm trying to keep focussed on the future and what is to come... with more success at some times than others.

OB appointment this afternoon. Bit scary. Also, as of this morning I will be taking my last metformin tablet, which is also scary. I put off telling people until after the nuchal scan... after the nuchal scan it became after the OB appointment... now... I suppose it will move again depending on what gets set out as the next few steps for us this afternoon. I don't think the fear and the worry will ever leave me.

BW

[Devon]

Oh Scooby - you have no idea how relieved I am for you! I was starting to get a bit worried. Phew, so glad that all is well with bubs. And good that you have an explanation for the spotting as well. Yay!!! I felt like you after the NT scan - this is really happening! It's the first time I've thought it might be real. I hope you're feeling happy and calm today!

BW - I'm sorry you're feeling a bit guilty. It really is OK for you to be excited about this baby, it certainly doesn't mean that you love your angel babies any less, or that they're not special, but clearly the baby that is growing inside you now will occupy most of your thoughts. I would look upon it as a good thing that the anniversaries aren't on your mind so much, those babies are still special to you no matter what, but you really do deserve to be excited about parasite! Best of luck for your OB appointment today, and for taking the last metformin tablet too - I can imagine how scary that must be for you. Hopefully your OB can reassure you about it. I know exactly what you mean about putting off telling people - I feel that way too - like I'm still not ready to make it public. Not sure how much longer I'll be able to put it off for, next OB appointment is at 15 weeks and I think it'll be pretty obvious by then.

[Acacia]

Devon - ahhh! So pleased everything went really well with your scan! And it leads me to ask: who... has been teaching your bub to give the finger?! Baby with attitude! Such a great NT result, and I'm glad that you're feeling like it'll be a bit easier to relax now - you certainly sound it in your post, hun!! Huge congratulations, and I hope the buzz keeps going and going as you head further into your lovely healthy pregnancy

scooby - so very relieved to hear your result too, lovely! Yeehaw, alright! Everything on track, and so glad you know what the spotting is. Enjoy the feeling - there is nothing like it, is there? So pleased for you

BW - firstly I've read your last couple of blog entries, in particular today's one. If it helps at all,I really really understand that feeling of being completely at a loss, and still worried. Having that scan at 12 weeks is brilliant, but within a week of that, I found for me that the worry returned and it was hard again. And then to have your OB breeze you through an appointment and not deal with anything other than the physical aspects of where your pregnancy is at now... My first OB appointment was scheduled by my GP over here at 11 weeks and he basically said to me "What are you doing seeing me so early? I don't need to see you until 21 weeks - I didn't even get to ask my questions before I was bundled out of his office, so I really get that feeling. I felt so disappointed and fragile about the whole thing. And not long after my 12 week scan, I started to feel lost and worried because of - exactly as you say - this big gap where nothing is going on, and you don't feel or look very pregnant, there's nothing tangible to associate with this little thing that's meant to be growing inside you, and you're struggling because of all you've been through to get to this point. You recognise that everything is going well, and that being told "I'll see you in so many weeks" is a good comment coming from your OB, but it doesn't satisfy the fear and concern you still have. When the milestones and appointments are coming thick and fast, and least you're having regular enough reassurances about everything. So please know I really get where you're at atm. It took a little time to get it for me (3 separate tries over 2 weeks), but can you see your GP and have a listen for the heartbeat with a Doppler somewhere in that gap within the next few weeks? I can't tell you how much reassurance and relief that gave in that time where not a lot was happening and when I wasn't being directed in my antenatal care at all. Can you arrange to have your acupuncture more regularly still? I also found that, as you've said focussing on the future and the positives helped too, as often as I was able to amongst the worries. I also wanted to let you know, just as Devon has said, it's ok to enjoy things and not to feel guilty for it, even if it just happens for moments at a time. It struck me - and hopefully it's ok to be suggesting it - that if you're thinking about changing your avatar soon, maybe you might like to memorialise your angels in your avatar in some way? It wouldn't have to be a big deal or over the top, just something that was significant to you in acknowledging the importance of your angels in your journey and that they will always be with you, whether there are times that you are coping better or not. I think you're doing so amazingly - you've been through so much to get to this point, and you have so much strength to go through challenges the way you do. I hope that coming off the metformin isn't too stresssful for you. I can imagine how hard that must be, as it's hard enough to feel in control of where you're at now without having to let something go like that. Arghhh, sorry for the huge rambling post, but I wanted to let you know that I do understand where you're coming from, and I'm thinking of you lots.

All is well here - nothing further to report! Ahh, except that I'm starting pregnancy yoga next week for the first time, and I'm thinking about looking further into acupuncture for the first time - it feels really nice to be doing so positive, proactive things at this point.

and hi to Shannon, and to all you lovely yummy mummys and mums-to-be.

Miss C

[butterfly_warrior]

Miss C, thank you! I think I've got my blog fixed and working so that people can actually comment on it now, but thank you for taking the time to sympathise with me and let me know I'm not being crazy or unreasonable!

For those who haven't read my blog - my OB was called out to a birth during our appointment yesterday so we had all of 5 minutes. Blood pressure was checked, baby was check with an ultra-quick scan that stopped as soon as a heartbeat was found, I was told to take more iron tablets (2 each day, not one), and that was it. No chance for me to ask questions about the next stage, no chance for me to find out if this little iron-leach I have could be sucking other minerals out of me as well, no chance to ask about the rotten headaches and muscle cramps that I've been having. She completely forgot about sending me for the early glucose test, and I'm not complaining too much, but with being off the metformin and still on the prednisone I'm worried that problems may go undetected for too long. Prednisone messes up blood sugar and insulin levels, and the metformin was at least protecting me from a bit of that. I do absolutely nothing for the next 4 weeks, and then in the space of a week I have my 18 week scan, my next acupuncture appointment, my next OB appointment and a wedding!

I'm feeling a bit calmer about it all this morning. I've emailed a friend (who just happens to be an OB), and hopefully she can tackle some of my questions and give me some reassurance. I was already thinking along the lines of what Miss C suggested and seeing my GP in a few weeks - even if it's just to get my iron levels rechecked and make sure everything is ok there. I've been seriously thinking of hiring a doppler to allow me to keep an eye on things... And I suppose the one thing I need to get my head around is that I'm 14 weeks today (my ticker will catch up in a bit, I'm sure!), I'm past the danger period, I'm settling into the second trimester, and there's not a whole lot that NEEDS to happen now, other than the baby doing a stack of growing!

Devon, thank you also for your reassurance. It just feels a little like I'm forgetting my angel babies and they don't matter now that I have one that is giving every appearance of sticking... I know it's not true, but this horrid game messes with your head something horrid!

BW

[Ellie]

Hi Everyone
I've been to scared to post...but have been lurking...we had our 6 week scan on Tuesday and saw a beautiful little heartbeat! Still absolutely terrified...but we live in hope! Looking forward to joining in if that's ok?