Hi ladies,
Well, im having a bit of a down day today. I feel a bit sad that I have been ttc for nearly 3 years with small success' that were taken away too quickly. What sparked this? I found some photos of my u/s with DS today, one from when he was 10wks and one at 20wks. They were also with photos of my pg belly at 7 months. I was sitting there on the bed looking at these photos and I just couldnt remember what it felt like to be pg, it seems like an eternity ago. I kept thinking....its just been too long. I just cant wait to see that little jelly bean bouncing around the u/s screen again or seeing its perfect little tiny little body wriggling around at 20wks. I know I have to be patient but it just feels like its a hopeless quest sometimes.
So now im sitting here on my bed, writing this with an avacado and yogurt face mask on, munching on rocky road chocolate and sipping on a glass on cab sav. Naughty I know....since im supposed to be looking after myself, especially since ov time is just around the corner.
Does anyone else just feel like its never going to happen? Like they are never going to see those two magical lines appear on the white stick again?
I do. Most of the time I manage to look on the bright side of things, but every now and again the light fades and im left in the shadows. I dont know if its the longing or dissapointment that hurts more.
Ok enough of this....more chocolate and wine should do the trick
Sorry for the crappy post,
Issy
So enjoy that wine and chocolate, let the face mask do it's thing, and treat yourself really well. As I said you're a strong, resliant, loving, warm, caring and beautiful person! You have every right to feel what you're feeling, and to take good care of yourself (including special treats!). It is going to happen for you, and when it does, you're going to make an absolutely fantastic mother!
It must have been so hard to come across the photos and u/s! 
Life throws us many curve balls, and while normally you're positive and looking for that silver lining, you have to expect that there will be days where the glass is just half empty! It's ok to have a bad day sometimes, and it's ok to let those sad feelings come out--better to get them out than to keep them bottled up inside. I know you must feel so disappointed--and the longing is the worst part. I've realized that I just want to be pregnant--I mean, of course, I want the beautiful baby at the end--but I've felt robbed of just feeling all the pregnant feelings! The moving and kicking that I never even got to feel... I want THAT! So, issy, please don't feel alone during this time, and don't feel like you always have to be positive about things! We're all here for you, hun, in good times and bad, just as you are! 
fest until it comes. Was late starting AF, so maybe just a little off with O, as well. Guess I'll just wait and see...
is going on with your cycle? I'm so sorry, hun, you must feel really discouraged 
to anyone I've missed
for you!
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