Registered User
I'd go to see a stripper with my partner so I'm not morally opposed to them. But I think the whole point of seeing a stranger naked is that it's meant to be erotic so I would want to share that experience with him. I can't really grasp the concept of it "being a laugh". Luckily I find myself quite hilarious - I don't need to see people's bits and bobs for an amusing night out.
Moderator
No problem with strippers here. DH used to bounce at a strip club in his younger days before me, so has seen and done it all, as such is completely over it. As for the touching bit, wouldn't not be too happy, but would much rather he touch someone with whom he has no emotional attachment than someone he knows.
Registered User
i don't have a problem with strippers for bucks nights and that kind of thing. I think it really depends on the person, I arranged for a stripper for a girlfriends hens night, and she loved it! SOme friends organisaed one for mine (my first wedding), and I was so embarrassed!! Not my kind of thing, but happy to watch it all happen for someone else!
I think that so long as everyone is being honest with their partners, it is all just a bit of fun really! I would be concerend though if my DH suddenly started going to strip clubs regularly, but he doesn't do that.
Caro, I don't mean to judge, but I don't think many of us put an opinion with regards to the food off the stripper. I'm sure we all wouldn't like our partners to eat off another woman's body. They should be eating off us! I'm of the look but don't touch policy.
Registered User
yeah i dont mind the just looking part but when it comes to sticking things places then it is a bit full on.
i trust dp and i know he wouldnt do anything.
thanks for all your thoughts on the topic
Registered User
I don't have an issue with the stripper thing either.
I'd like to think that DH & I are in a good enough place in our relationship that it just isn't an issue.
Its a little bit like porn, etc - to think that they don't go there is a little naive - Guys are guys, and genetically - I think thats just how they're made up!
Its all in a little fun, as well, because its not reality, so whatever
I also think that ultimately, if your man is inclined to cheat, then I don't think avoiding places and situations like that will deter him - He will either do it, or he won't.
I don't have a problem with my DH being in situations with strippers - If he was to cheat, I figure I would rather it happen so I could deal with it, leave him, and not waste any more of my life being with a man that wasn't 100% committed to me and our relationship. (Better I find out sooner rather than later)
I also believe that respect & trust is the building frame in any relationship - To ask him not to go, or make a fuss over him going, or simply not allowing him to go would be total disrespect to him - Almost telling him that I didn't trust him or his intention to us.
He recently went to a strip club on a bucks night where all of the men made a pact that they wouldn't tell anyone - so as none of their partners would find out.
He laughed at them all and told them they were being ridicuous - And they were floored when he told them that he would tell me, and that I would be fine...
DH told them that it was stupid to think that I wouldn't expect them to have strippers as part of a bucks night...
Just my opinion
Registered User
You cant stop what the guys plan for him - even if they promise to abide by your wishes. Its his last night of "freedom" as they see it. They just wanna have some fun.
If he is marrying you there has to be a reason, right! Hes not marrying a stripper. He might go and get his appetite started somewhere else, but he willl come home to eat his pie! and its not like he does it every weekend, its his bucks and has to do the "male ****y thing"..... hope you all know what i mean by that!!!! Dont let the guys think he is "pussy whipped" (dont mean to offend, its just what they call it)..... otherwise the guys will see you as the baddy, forever!!!
and if you want a stripper, same as above!
CARO! I think that is just a given any woman would be irrate over an incident as such... I myself just didn't see this other post you mentioned.
Caro - I have been payed to travel to clubs all over Australia, even Perth (If I remember correctly that is where you are from). I have never seen any of that seedy stuff in the clubs I have worked in and if any dancer demonstrated that sort of behaviour they would be escorted from the club immediately. The girls in Perth were telling me that there were plenty of nasty clubs in Perth, but can honestly say I never needed to be crude or dirty as you say to make the cash. It is indeed a very competitive industry, but I refuse to believe or agree that the majority of the industry is corrupt. I won't deny that I absolutely loved dancing, getting paid to work-out on the pole... After awhile I became so efficient on the pole that I didn't even need to work out at the gym to maintain myself. Of course there were ridiculous and obserred offers made on behalf of the gentleman or not so gentleman - but I think that's just men testing their boundaries. I have never known any girls to take up any of those offers! I have seen a few trashy feral girls asked not to come back. It’s the girls like that, that gives the rest of us the bad reputation.
Registered User
Catherine, It is great to get a perspective from someone who has worked in the industry!
Personally I have no problem with it whatsoever. DH went to the strippers for his bucks and told me in detail all about it. He has also been for other peoples' bucks, and again will tell me all about it, as he does about any night out.
I am not interested whatsoever in seeing men strip, and i have only ever been once. I didn't go for my hens. I am with Shell, I would much rather watch women strip! :P
Registered User
Strippers in clubs are often different to those you can hire to come to your place & yes I have seen & heard of some disgusting things from private stippers. But then what one person thinks is disgusting another may not.
In regards to cheating, I wouldn't not want my DH to go because I think he will cheat. That's just silly. He would never cheat & going to a strip club doesn't equal cheating. I simply don't like what some of the strippers do. Though I would never tell DH what he can & can't do & he wouldn't me either. Some things are just a simple understanding that you know how the other feels about it & you make your decision from there.
Registered User
Same here Shell
Registered User
caro - it was me who posted about the chupa chup thing and believe me i was not impressed by it at all. we had a massive fight about it as i felt like he had crossed the line and gone too far. i am a pretty reasonable and tolerant person but this made my blood boil. especially as i was sitting at home 7 months pg not feeling too sexually attractive iykwim? in his defence, the story is that he was sitting on a chair drinking a beer wayching the show when she inserted the chupa chup in her and then proceeded to do a backflip onto him, knocked his beer all over him (i then had to wash his beer covered shirt grrr) and landed with the chupa chup basically right in his face so he was left with not much of a choice but to bite the stick out with his mouth simply so she could move on with her 'show' and get off him. it's all part of the act apparantly and very dirty. let me just say that he wasn't proud about doing it..and when he told me about it it was more he was just telling me matter of factly this is how it happened iykwim? anyway, i was glad he told me and was 100% honest with me about it. i agree it is very sleazy and dirty though and my dp is a very honest and loyal bloke. he's not a sleazebag at all and has never given me any reason not to trust him ever.
talking about dirty shows though, my ex once had a work xmas party where they had two female strippers come and dress up in school uniforms and perform a live sex act in front of them all. nice hey??
Registered User
they're electricians....the boss organised it for them and they thought it was great...
Caro - Indeed it is an artform.. It is one thing to throw your panties off and flash your box and another to have the strength to manouver on a pole to show how beautiful the woman's body is. It's quite challenging getting up there and being watched and judged. Most of the time I would forget about who was watching because working the pole is very challenging! I have fallen on my head a few times..
Megiemoppit - I agree, I would much rather a woman than a bloke... Woman have such beautiful bodies whereas I don't find male strippers sexy at all... Just funny! I remember one we had for a gf's 30th - God he was a cracker... short little fellow and had the birthday girl hit his butt with a paddle - his bum was so red and then he started squirting baby oil all over himself! So far from sexy, but god it made us all laugh!
Strippers have such a bad reputation, but in all honesty, most of my regular clients would come in and book me just to chat about general random conversation. Many of them were married - but I don't feel as though I did anything to disrespect their wives. I remember one client would come in and pay quite a bit of cash for me to wear red toe nail polish and to give me a foot massage (fully clothed mind you) - he had a foot fetish but his wife didn't know... There were some strange clients but most of them were really normal guys and were very respectful. Lots of funny memories... I don't regret any of it!
Sorry to get a bit off topic.
ETA - I go off to feed Rochelle and come back to more posts! Gracie, that is feral - both things in your post. Was this a club or private entertainer? Even private functions in clubs I have worked in have never allowed anything like that. Everything is video taped and they are constantly audited. I've never even seen sex acts performed in a club. Most states dancers aren't even allowed to have their hands 30cms of their vajayjays. The only special show's i remember we're themed shows... The one I performed most was in firefighter overalls and fire tricks with flavoured kero - nothing to do with my hooha and nothing really obsene about it. Shame that's what some girls have to resort to... but obviously there is a demand for that sort of thing? Maybe they have to resort to that sort of thing because they aren't very skilled in other areas such as club and pole work.
Last edited by CatherineL; December 4th, 2007 at 11:37 AM.
Registered User
DH and I didn't have strippers at our bucks or hens nights. My friends kept threatening that they would get me one and I was so worried. I think I would have cried if one had turned up and I certainly wouldn't have stuck around to see it! lol. It would have just made me feel extremely uncomfortable. Luckily DH shares my views and didn't want one either. For me, anything 'sexual' should be between partners, not with some random stranger. So even watching someone dancing around naked feels wrong to me. For us 'sexual stuff' is something personal and something I only want to share with DH not a stripper and a room full of ppl!! lol.
I also don't get celebrating getting married with seeing someone else dance around naked, and I too have heard feral stories. One of my friends was at a party and a stripper came and she put some beads up her bum and the guy pulled them out with his teeth, eww....
Registered User
Catherine- no neither of these incidents were at clubs- the one with the two girls having sex was at a private residence and was all pre booked and planned for them to come that day (it was at 11am weird hey?). the other one (chupa chup) was called out to their factory on a friday arvo.
Registered User
I'd have been really hurt if DH had a stripper at his bucks. Fortunately he and I both think the private strippers are tacky (from our limited experience... Mine was only once, and even then I walked out.)
Sorry - I'll admit, I have self-esteem issues and at times really hate my body. But even 'tasteful' pole dancing gets my back up because it is promoting one type of body as being beautiful. (This is an assumption of mine, going from TV shows etc - I have never seen a stripper with cellulite.)
Reply With Quote
Bookmarks