Hugs to you Nessa. I hope you both find some happiness soon. Thanks for the tips on the cloth nappies - I'll have a look. I'll also ask Elli what she reckons! Ta!
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Oh Beatrix, I'm so sorry to hear about your marriage. They do get challenging at times, eh. I honestly don't know how you do three kids, I think you're superwoman! I have trouble with my two who are widely spaced in age. I barely have time for the eldest anymore, I read her a bedtime story and spend 3 minutes with her in the morning. I'm really upset about it actually and don't know what to do about it, I just can't seem to find the time. Thank God DH is superdad, he's been there for her while I try to sleep or carry on with this baby strapped to me 24/7. I think I'm going to have to change my routine soon, or I'll lose her altogether. DH and she still cosleep, but I'm cosleeping with DS in the spare room so I'm missing all that crucial togetherness we enjoyed. I may have to sacrifice a few hours sleep and go to bed later and fall asleep with her at night. Currently, I go to sleep when DS does, which is about two hours before DD would be asleep, which would then be cutting it really close to DS feed time so I'd basically miss that whole sleep cycle. But I have to I think, or the guilt won't be worth it. I miss my girl. And I know she misses me.
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Hugs to you Nessa. I hope you both find some happiness soon. Thanks for the tips on the cloth nappies - I'll have a look. I'll also ask Elli what she reckons! Ta!
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Janine- Hope you figure out how to juggle both small ones. I'm having a hard enough time trying to pay enough attention to Dh and DD... Le sigh. How does one go about establishing a routine for sleeping/feed? Or do you just pray and hope that one starts to emerge? Lila had a really good one going for a few weeks- sleep four hours, feed, up two hours- lather rinse repeat. That's gone out the window. Sometimes she's up for 12-14 hours at a whack no matter what I do. I've cut everything tasty out of my diet, just don't know.
Nettie- Our place is unheated, too. I've been putting several layers of blankets on her at night. I bought a 2.5 grobag that she seems to like. I figure when its colder I'll just put her in a thick jumpsuit, the grobag, and put her in the bed between us for extra warmth. Lila's pretty alert these days, too. Smiles and almost laughs and coos.
Mgm- I have a Bubba Moe sling, which is pretty good even though I'm sure I'm not using it right. After a few hours my shoulder starts killing me. I have no idea (despite online and written instructions) how to put it on the way they tell me to. I'm thinking of getting a Mei Tai.
Nessa- Sorry to hear about your husband. That's really hard, I don't know what to say but you're in my thoughts.
I tried giving Lila the breast this morning and she flat refused. I guess the bottle is much easier, even the Back to Nature ones I've been using that are supposedly more breast-like. We had been doing ok with bfing except the thrush. That's when I started expressing, now looks like I have a choice between expressing til she's weaned, going to formula (really don't want to), or re-learning bfing. Any tips? I'm so scared about the re-learning, I had two cracked nipples before and really like having healed ones. I don't know, maybe I'll go rent an electric pump and just do it that way...?
Not much sleep last night, went down at 8pm after and hour of fussing, slept til 1ish. Fed, brought up some wind, back down around 3. I expressed til 3:30 and went to bed, only to be dragged back out at 5:30. She slept this morning for an hour in the sling and then wasn't having any more of it. I just don't understand how she gets by with so little sleep. I sleep when she does and I'm exhausted. Beat. My books say newborns sleep 14-19 hours a day. What a laugh.
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Sheesh, Steph, is she content awake, or fussy awake all that time? Kudos to you, that would be difficult. If she's fussy, maybe she's having trouble going to sleep? Re routine, one sort of emerged for us, but it changes a bit each day. I just know that he goes 2 to 3 hours between feeds 24/7, is awake for about a half hour after feeds, then sleeps - lather rinse repeat :lol. I have to keep settling in the sling though, or he'd be up after one sleep cycle of half hour most of the time. When I'm busy, it's auto soothe, but if I'm sitting and reading, GOD FORBID!! Ci no likey me to sit and relax, so I have to get up now and again b/w sleep cycles and bounce or whatnot. DH simply moves his foot and it rocks him back to sleep, he doesnt' do that for me though. The longest awake time is late afternoon when I push him from a 3pm feed to an after 4 sleep, then awake again at 5 until 6.30 - when I put him to sleep with a feed. It seems to kick the witching hour in the a$$, which used to hit at about 7pm. Although, I can't seem to get him to sleep on the right boob, he hates it cos it's too fast. So he sucks my little finger until he falls asleep if we're on the right boob after his feed is done.
He's waking cranky, gotta go...
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Sometimes she's content awake, but that generally devolves into fussiness if I'm not holding her. She'll fall asleep on my chest but the second I'm not sitting bolt upright on the couch (heaven forbid I stretch out or move off the couch) she wakes up. If I put her down she wakes up. If I try to take her to bed to sleep with her she wakes up. This has been going on for three or so weeks now so I'm over it. I try getting her to self settle but maybe I'm not doing something I should be, she just lies there and screams and I'm not into letting her scream herself to sleep. Bah. I just fed her and put her to bed, she's lying here next to me gurgling but I can't very well go to sleep when she's not. I could, but would just have to get right back up which is killer and upsets me more than if I hadn't slept at all.
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Hi ladies, no time really for personals atm, will try to do some later tonight.
Last night Oliver started screaming during his feed again, and when he brought up wind he would cry also, now I don't know if it's wind related screaming, reflux related screaming (as he gets some milk come back up with each burp) or whether he has an upset tummy as one of his poos was quite watery last night (it was more the consistency of cream really, sorry if that is TMI for everyone) so I am thinking that maybe he has a viral infection since last week he was a little congested in the nose with green mucous coming out his nose, and a bit of a cough, but his nose and cough have been really good this week, he still sleeps really well, although I have decided to throw (my) routine out the window and just let him sleep/feed when he wants, if that means he will need a feed while we are at school waiting to collect Jordan, then I take a bottle pre-heated and put in insulated pocket of bag and formula in a container and then feed him when we get to school.
Well, i'm off to have a coffee before the school pick up. BBL
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I'm struggling to workout if Greer needs a feed or just needs to cry. She seems to be feeding every hour and a half. I try to work out if it has built up to a cry and therefore maybe needs a feed. When I hold her she seems to root all the time for a feed and will contently feed when she finds the boob- note I am not giving it to her, she is rooting and finding it, she then settles and minutes later is back to crying. I have a night alone with the two kids tonight and do not know how I am going to handle it if she is fussing all day today.
Beatrix I know you have said that you have had counselling with DH, but have the two of you talked about why he is grumpy. My DH is grumpy and a lot lately too and there are 2 issues. One is me saying I wish I had his life and I'm going to be the man in my next life and the other is that he realy wants to have as he put it "a vacation from life with me". He is missing the pre children relationship. Is there a chance you could arrange for someone to have the kids, go out for a coffee and talk about how you are feeling?
Gotta go to deal with this screaming child, going to try lying down with her.
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Steph - not sure if it helps, but we find Liam is settling without us holding him constantly now that we're wrapping him well and warmly. Have u tried a ticking clock under the mattress too in case it's the heartbeat thing?
Just an idea!
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omg that is exactly Dh is prob, i am always saying how easy he has it etc. i should learn to shut up. His work is very stressful atm as well, (****er boss) and he is feeling very trapped having no drivers license so there is alot going on for him.
I would love to arrange a time but atm he is working 6-6, 5-6days a week and my parents (only people i trust with my kids) have just left this morning for 6 weeks!!
On the up side he has just sent me a mega long text message saying he knows he has been really unsupportive and everything so he knows and is sorry, just doesnt know how to feel better about it.
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Tarnee sounds like Charlotte is doing really well, Oliver is starting to get rolls on his little chicken legs, they look so cute.
Shoegal bighope Baxter does well with his tests.
Fire I know that when I get a fairly good nights rest without Oliver fussing too much I feel like I can handle anything the following day, hope bubs does well again tonight.
Beatrix i'm not looking forward to Oliver getting his needles, it always makes me sad, but I know it is better for him in the long run. Sorry to hear that you and DH aren't getting along atm, a new baby in the house can test the strongest of relationships, hope you manage to get things sorted out.
BabyWrangler I gave up on forcing Oliver's routine on him today and he has seemed much more settled, even after his bath tonight, he had his bottle, seemed to fight sleep for a bit, but think that was because he got a little overtired, he was asleep by 5.30pm and is still sleeping now, will be going in to do a 'sneaky feed' at 10.30 if he hasn't woken by then. That is great that BJ is going so good now that he seems to be on the right medication for his reflux.
bellelass I started comp feeding with my 6 year old when he was 4 days old as my milk hadn't come in (didn't come in till day 8) and found it a struggle to get him feeding properly from the breast as it was obvious he preferred the bottle because it was easier, which is why I gave up, hope you manage to get bubs back to exclusively BF if that's what you want.
alittlegrubi hope you managed to figure out what Greer wanted in the end, and I am sure that you coped fine tonight on your own.
As for the cloth nappies, I planned to use disposable nappies Oliver right from the start, I did the whole cloth nappy thing with my 2 eldest and to be honest I just couldn't be bothered with it this time.
Oliver's routine today was pretty good for me actually, and he was the one who set the pace, he had his night feed at 4am, I then did have to wake him at 7.30 for his feed or he would have screamed in the car on the way to school as we have to leave at 8am, got him home, and he stayed awake for about 40 mins, I put him to bed still awake and he then slept till 12.30, where as before I would have woken him up at 10.30 so that then I could get him up at 2 for the before school pick up feed, but this way, he wasn't going to be needing another feed until 4ish, well when we got home, he slept until 4 but wasn't grizzly for a feed, so I bathed him at 4.30, he had his bottle at 5 and was in bed asleep by 5.30, at his 5pm feed he actually had 140ml of his bottle which amazed me, so he seems to be going 5 hours or so between feeds which is fine with me
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All those getting those needles for their babies, I caution against the six in one shots they've just brought out. I caution against all of them really, but that one in particular is nasty.
Grubi, it could be a growth spurt?
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Hi All,
Just a quick post - hope I am not gloating too much but I just had my 3rd night in a row of Charlotte 'sleeping through'. The first 2 nights she slept 10pm until 4.30am and last night was 8.30pm until 5am. She feeds every hour from 5pm until bedtime and after the early morning feed, she goes back to sleep until about 9am. I am getting soooo much sleep!!
The one problem with this - my very, very engorged boobs in the morning - they woke me up before she did this morning. I had to pump out 200mls from one boob whilst she fed on the other because I was sooo uncomfortable and already I can feel that I have filled up enough to keep me going for the day. I am wondering if I am risking losing my supply with her going so long between feeds. Do you think I should express both boobs until they are empty after she has gone to sleep at night so that they have all night to fill?? It will help me to build up my milk supply in the freezer anyway??
Hope the sleep fairies visit your place soon too!!
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tarnee! you suck!that's so cool, maybe i'll do the every hour thing in the late day... i wouldn't mess too much with your supply until it has established itself, which it will do on it's own. whatever you express, your breasts will replace, incl oversupply, it will just adjust. i am gonna get dh to take off the excess next engorgement, and just enough that i can handle the feeling without having to wake DS.
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Tarnee - I am so jealous! I might try that too -hourly feeds. Does she feed as much each time or are they just 'snacks'?
Nothing much to report here... will check back later!
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Wow Tarnee thats great!
Bj is doing well in my eyes, bed and asleep by about 7:30 last night (he was very tired after a mucked up day yesterday), then i went in and fed him while he slept at 10:30pm, he went through til 4am, had a feed, back to sleep til 8:45, then a feed, up til about 10:00, into bed again, then up for us to go out at 11:30(I woke him), we went to a friends place and he slept til 2, had a feed, then was back in bed when we got home at 4:30....next feed is due about 6pm with his medi, then we start it all again.
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Beatrix this post is for you
OMG
I think that it is just that the two of us me and DH and probably for yourself too is that we are always too stressed by what we are doing (him - work and no time for self, me/you- kids and lack of sleep.
Not that this is for you, but I found that by giving him permission to have a night out with the boys helped. Maybe you could ask DH what would he like to do if he didn't have to consider anyone else and let him have it even if you have to wait 6 weeks if he wants a date with you. Do something romantic like handmake an invite to a date, just the two of you, again even if it is at home - write like coffee and cake for 2 at Chateau Beatrix - for a time when the kids are sleeping. I actually left a post it note on my DH's pillow asking him to have an affair with me and then I'd text him before he came home asking him to meet at my place for a quickie. If you treat him like someone you were starting a relationship with things might improve. Leave post its in his briefcase/lunchbox, on his toothbrush etc saying I love you in different ways. Give him something to smile about and he might start doing the same.
Sounds to me like he wants it to work... you're just going through a rough patch.
Going for a seperate post for the rest of you....
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Tarnee If you keep expressing, won't that tell your supply to keep up for that time frame when she isn't feeding. Lucky you on the sleep through.
Sharon We went and laid down in the afternoon and I just kept talking to her when she cried until she fell asleep. We slept for about 2 and a half hours. When she started again for the witching hour, I tried the AP comforting, but ended up giving her a bath, fresh clothes a feed and she slept for an hour and a half from 8pm to 9.30pm, then fed again and slept until just befor 1am, then fed again and slept for another 4 hours until just after 4am, alert for a short time and back to sleep until 7.30am. I actually dealt with my day very well including cooking dinner and cleaning up - which I had written off when I posted yesterday.
Fire might be a growth spurt, she seems to need the feeds as she hasn't had a power chuck, which I have now identified as me overfeeding when she just needs some love and healing time. I'm trying to workout if I should by Tears and Tantrums or Aware Baby first since I can't find the in any public library in WA.
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a quick hello to you all - quick because i'm cooking risotto (needs constant stirring). i have the sling on, all ready for the first sound of grizzling from DD, but amazingly she's currently quite content lying in a cocoon in the loungeroom to the sounds of eurovision.
tarnee, you must be the most well-rested mother in australia! i would happily endure the engorged breasts to sleep all night long... but i can't complain because although dd is waking frequently for feeds, she's going back to sleep after instead of having two-hour waking periods at ungodly hours. that said, i hope i haven't jinxed tonight by writing this because you never know with babies...
beatrix and grubi, good luck with your DHs. there's nothing more testing for a relationship than the arrival of babies. before dd arrived, dh and i managed to resolve some issues that had been weighing on my mind for years and that has made an enormous difference. he is very very slow to respond to emotional things, so i always ask him go away and think about things before responding because i know he takes time (days, even weeks!) to take things in. i have even put things in writing at times because it helps me clarify my thoughts and allows him to read, re-read and make a considered response. men can be so different from womenn sometimes...
ok gotta go. wishing a good and restful night to everyone!
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