i am really sorry to hear of what you have been and are going through. You will find alot of support and comfort through this site, it has been amazing for me to be able to have a place where people don't judge but are accepting of anything you are feeling. I am sending you loads of hugs and you will find that it will be hard for people to accept your feelings of grief. But try and talk about it and the right person will come along eventually and give you a chance to off load. Your baby was real, your feelings are real so please ramble anytime you need to!!!! xxx