I don't think its weird at all.
When I have studied family history its quite common to give a sibling the name of an earlier sibling who has died. I think that's a bit more harder to take but obviously people were fine with it.
My Mums sister died one month before I was born, her name was Mary Adeline (referred to as Adeline)
I was then named Mary, a name I have come to treasure because of its reference to a special person in my families life that I wish I had gotten to meet.
My DH and I wanted a family name for my DD, so we called her Adeline
We have had nothing but wonderful feedback from the family, including the original Adelines husband, brother and of course my Mum.
I hope my DD grows up feeling the same pride in using a loved ones name that I have
It must be hard when your DH feels awkward about it, good luck in arriving at the perfect name for your family.
I woudn't have a problem using it - you never know, but your DH's grandma might just adore holding a baby Jennifer who's a few generations down from her own little Jennifer...sounds a little strange but it might be something she's always needed or wanted. I could of course be wrong! But given she's open to talking about it, she might just rejoice in the chosen name
I agree that it would come across to me as an honnor.
we are naming our son after my grandad (dec) and alsthough i would like my brothers name as a middle name (its a long tradition) my DH wants me to use my fathers name as he has also passed away. So both names are after ppl very close to us that are no longer here.
My nan was very touched and moved when we told her. I am still yet to let my fathers parents know.
I would understand how hard this might be for your DH though as im sure he remembers sad times when this has been discussed as he was growing up.
my son is named after my step dads best friend that died and his parents thought it was awesome and i found out after that they were the same weight at birth
i think its up to u and ur DH maybe just talk to him about it some more and like other posters maybe to his grandma
If that Jennifer had lived, and you used the name, she, and many others, would be thrilled. If she had died recently, it would be the same. People would compliment you on your choice.
Why does that change because Jennifer was born still? It's still just as lovely a thing to do - and possibly a little more so. See if you can talk to the gran about it, gauge her reaction. It might just make her year to know that someone is going to properly acknowledge her precious little bundle, who would have been born in a time when these things were hidden.
My grandma had a baby that was born still. Her name was Heather and it's on our baby name shortlist. I think my Dad would be honoured if we used his sister's name (Grandma passed away a while ago), especially as there was no gravestone or anything else acknowledging this little soul. For me, it would honour a much loved and wanted baby who didn't make it.
But I can see the other side too. Whether from superstition or not wanting to remind someone else of there loss.
DS's middle name was going to be Paul. After MIL's brother who was killed in a car accident, & a baby she had not long after who lost his young life to SIDs. Instead though, we chose to honour FIL's middle name of Andrew instead so he will always know just how much he means to DH (he's not his biological father). Paul was decided on as a bad luck name in their family.
I see nothing wrong with it, but my preferance would be to use it as a middle name. Thats just me. I'm trying to decide on a family name myself to use for this one's middle name. I thought Ann would be good, because it was DH's sisters middle name & he never got to meet her before she died in a house fire at 12, but he doesn't agree. I have no idea what we will do.
Hi, I think if your dh is uncomfortable with it than don't use it, there are millions of other names out there. My mum had twins, one died a few weeks after birth and the other 6 months later I couldn't imagine anyone in our family using either of their names it really is a constant reminder. When I say anyone in the family I mean all of my cousins or if any of my aunties or uncles were to use it. Mind you there are about 20 cousins and they all have 3 (some 4) kids so that's a lot of naming going on. Having said that the twins names weren't as common as Jennifer, I'm sure your DH's grandmother has met dozens of Jennifer's over the years and doesn't really think about it. I know that my mum and dad and probably my aunts and uncles would think of the twins my parents lost when they hear those names. Everyone is different though, while others may be honored to hear that name used and remembered others may just be reminded of the pain. Only you know how your family members really feel.
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I couldn't imagine anyone in our family using either of their names it really is a constant reminder. When I say anyone in the family I mean all of my cousins or if any of my aunties or uncles were to use it. Mind you there are about 20 cousins and they all have 3 (some 4) kids so that's a lot of naming going on. Having said that the twins names weren't as common as Jennifer, I'm sure your DH's grandmother has met dozens of Jennifer's over the years and doesn't really think about it. I know that my mum and dad and probably my aunts and uncles would think of the twins my parents lost when they hear those names. Everyone is different though, while others may be honored to hear that name used and remembered others may just be reminded of the pain. Only you know how your family members really feel.
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