Hi,
I just read your birth story and I can see how you wouldn't want to go through that again. I've had 3 caesars (and tried to avoid each of them), but I can honestly say that an elect caesar is far better than an emerg one after labouring. I had an obs who was supportive of me trying for vba2c but I ended up getting pre-eclampsia, so she booked me in for a caesar. This meant that i got a midwife allocated to me in recovery and got bubs to stay with me and we had our first feed in recovery. I think there's also some studies re: the mental and emotional recovery is much quicker when a c/s is planned vs when it's not planned etc.

My third c/s was by far the better out of the three. Maybe just tell people that you're going to see how things pan out (and then just do what suits you), so you don't have to deal with their reactions. I got the opposite reaction to you: lots of doubt and fear about trying vbac etc and I felt that I had to justify my reasons. The non-committal line about 'seeing how things pan out' was much easier to trot out to anybody who asked.
Good luck and I hope you have a better birth experience this time around!