I really, really second Alan on this. Once you are in that setting, when you are tired and apprehensive - the weight of the words of a medical professional seems so much HEAVIER than if you were at home in front of the PC talking to BB about it all.
They are good at making it sound serious, yet simple at the same time. Its hard to fight, think or even voice yourself effectively, and tbh I think thats what they rely on.....
Awww sweety let it all out hun, cry, scream, shout, cry some more because it is ok to grieve the birth you didn't get.
These gorgeous people have said it all, you are not your mother, and in the hospital when you are so tired, so excited about meeting your little one, so terribly afraid that you will make the wrong decision, so confused about what is the right decision, it is easy to make decisions that you question later. It may not be the wrong decision or seem like that until later - hindsight is a wonderful but also frustrating thing. At the time i'm sure you weighed it all up and make those decisions based on your emotions and feelings at the time, as well as with the medical professions warped view on things that can be so convincing and reasonable.
Please talk as much as you can and get it out hun. In many ways I am still grieving my induction with Izzy and subsequent 2 c/s and I don't think I will ever truly get over it...accept it yes but stop wondering the why's?? probably not. You are definitely not alone and I don't think anyone who hasn't had a traumatic or disappointing birth ever gets it. it is frustrating and so dismissing to be told "well your baby is healthy what more do you want" especially as that brings more guilt. We are all here for you love and if you need to PM me do so anytime.
Starrysky, there are many of us here who can empathise with you and understand how you feel. As the others have said you need to cry and grieve and get it all out but it doesn't mean that you have to ever 'get over it'. Almost 3 years on and I am still wondering what I could have done differently etc. I think I have accepted it but I will never forget it and I will always wonder what would have happened if I have done a, b or c.
So come in here and vent, rant, cry, grieve, debrief as much as you feel that you need to - we are all here for you and we do understand!
Lucy in the sky with diamonds.
let it all out hun, cry, scream, shout, cry some more because it is ok to grieve the birth you didn't get.
Starrysky, there are many of us here who can empathise with you and understand how you feel. As the others have said you need to cry and grieve and get it all out but it doesn't mean that you have to ever 'get over it'. Almost 3 years on and I am still wondering what I could have done differently etc. I think I have accepted it but I will never forget it and I will always wonder what would have happened if I have done a, b or c.
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