I too luuurved your post misty, but gee my brain is wizzing. I am just wondering whether it is always best practice to wait until people are literally asking what you think before offering your own experiences? I kind of think all interactions are about sharing (and with that goes your insights into being fair to each other, which some would call the PC-ness of posting).

When I was planning a homebirth, I was interrogated by EVERYONE about my reasoning, and the process of listening to their experiences made me feel stronger in my own conviction. I know for a fact my own experience then changed the minds of many around me, even when they weren't expecting it, or 'looking' for advice, but were just receptive to hearing what I experienced itms?

I know the example provided about the c-sec thread was different (and I have seen similar threads before), but I think often a hoo-har occurs because someone wasn't looking for advice or even a countering opinion, but received it anyway. And I truly wonder if that is a bad thing? I TOTALLY agree with rules of engagement being necessary and if you can't add value or say something constructive, then don't say anything, but I honestly think very hard before posting and feel I have a right to contribute to some discussions (obviously only the ones that I have any knowledge/experience in) and I don't always agree with the consensus of viewpoints.

I know, that sometimes we're not receptive to the voices of others, but I am wondering why that is. I think this goes back to the idea of a community also being a 'safe' haven for some, and I can see that asking people to shift their views can be scary.

This discussion reminds me of other social movements gone before us, such as feminists, where other women became some of the strongest opponents of female liberation from gendered roles. Their receptiveness to calls for change were not there and that intrigues me.

I hope that community can be BOTH supportive and a vehicle for change, but I think that requires receptiveness to the opinions of others. Perhaps not ALL the time (like when the thread is titled VENT or Support needed), but if it is a genuine discussion point, I feel the need to be excused from automatically joining in the consenus (if I have a valid point).

My head hurts and I think my logic is circular....ouch!