emma,
i agree with sushee, you don't really find the strength but you just keep plodding along and then look back and say wow look where i have come from. obviously you're feeling extra sad as it is so soon after loss and it is very hard for you now. don't let anyone say it isn't hard either. my dh said to me when i had # 4 mc " well it must get easier" so stupid. we as women have such amazing strength, sometimes i don't even think we realise it. i am praying for you and i hope you just remember to make some time for grieving and some time for you!, you're the most important person right now. you need all the hugs you can get right now. xxoo