Possums - let me start with saying again ... sorry for you loss. I can feel that raw pain with you, its just unbearable.
I would have to agree with Sushee. I don't think think there is a time or way to feel "Strong". I fthere is, I certainly haven't found it!
After my first loss, and even my second, i used to see other peoples sigs with many more angels and wonder how they kept going. Now that i seemed to have become one of those women, I realise that we only keep going because there is little choice. i don't feel brave or strong about my losses but i have no choice but to deal with it and keep on trying. What else can you do? Give up on the hope of a family? Curl up in a ball and never come out? (trust me, this option has sounded really wonderful at time) Personally,trying for another baby probably is an obsession. I can't and won't let it go. Much as i feel i couldn't cope with any more dead babies, I do know that if that were to happen, i would find a way to pick myself up and keep trying.
The added stress of assisted conception really does escalate the emotions. There is sooooo much invested in each cycle ( emotionally and financially).Not falling pg is bad enough but getting that elusive BFP, only to lose such a precious gift, that is just devastating.
I am currently inan enforced break from TTC as I still recover from my last, very traumatic loss but there isn't a day that goes by when i am not thinking about babies, IVF, m/c etc. We are going on holiday in 2 days and yes it will be nice to get away but am I going to truly relax and enjoy? HOnestly, I will be still thinking about getting back home to start another cycle.
So, i guess I don't have good answers or great words of wisdom for you. Do whatever you need to protect yourself and keep yourself sain. Don't expect yourself to be happy and social just for the sake of others. I have become a partial hermit at times as talking with those who don't know or understand is just to hard. Do what is right for YOU and your DH. There is no easy way out of this but you will get through and hopefully soon with a baby to show for all the pain