Why do people think it's ok?

[Nadine216]

But that is exactly my point - I (and ppl who does not know what is going on) does not KNOW that you are probbed and tested and how long you have been ttc and failure after failure. I don't KNOW what happens when someone IVF, I only know that they are having trouble getting pg. You guys talk about needles and OHSS and follicle scans and god knows what. It sounds horrific and I GET that. God, I would be scared out of my mind if I have to go through something like this. I can understand that you are p!ssed and hurt and sad and just plain sick of everything.
(I forgot what point I wanted to make)
BG - I meant the whole being pg journey. True, you don't invite ppl into your bedroom to enjoy the ride, so to speak. But once pg EVERYONE wants to touch your belly, buy your bubba gifts, ask how are your pg are going, say that you should not stand so much - that journey. I would just like to know what to say?? Or do you just shut up? And I can recpect that you ask a person how are YOU doing, not how are your IVF going.

[butterfly_warrior]

I guess the key point here is to ask and find out exactly what it is that each person going through assisted conception wants in terms of support.

If someone tells me that they are thinking of me, fine, I can deal with that. When someone wants to get intimately involved with the process, not fine. When someone starts to act like an IVF expert just because they read a newspaper article - NOT FINE!

I guess it comes down to simple respect. My mother has been cut out of the information loop because she could only ask me how "things" were going. If she can't give me the respect of naming my infertility and the treatment I need, then she's not going to be given the respect of being told what's going on.

And just to make things super difficult for everyone - there's times where I'll be super-open about everything. And there's times when I'll want to completely clam up. Take your lead from the person undergoing AC, I don't think it's possible to give anyone a set rule of dealing with it. Even for myself the way I feel about it all changes from day to day, I can't imagine that anyone else would be much different.

BW