mathew's mum - good to hear that things went well. what you have described sounds just so beautiful.

today is a good day for me, not sure why, but thanks for asking.

it's so hard to know what's right when deciding something as important as memoralising our babies.

i think we as mothers and parents, will never stop finding ways to celebrate and cherish our little ones memory but the first big step takes so much emotional investment.

my DH and i have had a service in the funeral directors chapel for each of our little ones. they don't get any easier. for our first child Amelia, we invited close family members. i never imagined we would have to endure our childs funeral again, but that wasn't to be. for our second child Nicholas and our third child Sophie, it was just us. we didn't hold it together, but that was ok, we were together.

one day we will decide what to do next and how and where to place their ashes. I am just not sure i am ready to let go yet. probably a memorial service, but we'll see.

i understand Gigi1's feelings of obsession and it's so good to hear all ideas of remembrance. people say i am strong, but i find strength in the experiences of being a mother and the memories of my babies. i also get inspiration from the other mothers on BB, sharing their anguish, their love and good days and their bad days, their hopes and dreams. in unity there is strength.