Page 6 of 11 FirstFirst ... 45678 ... LastLast
Results 91 to 108 of 183

Thread: Trying to Conceive after Loss or Miscarriage ~ June 08 #3

  1. #91

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    North side, Brisbane
    Posts
    754

    Default

    Doesn't anyone understand!! I am doing as much research as I can about when it is safe to TTC after MS, and my husband and mum are telling me to stop worrying about it and just let it happen. Grrr I don't want to just wait. That could take months or years. I need to temp and I need to feel secure that if we were to TTC straight away that it would not be bad for the pregnancy. They are just telling me that getting all worked up about it isn't going to help me any, and suggesting that it could hinder my chances of falling preg cause I'm stressed about it. I'm not getting worked up, at least I wasn't until they told me to stop doing what I'm doing. I'm researching! Grrrr


  2. #92

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    NSW
    Posts
    696

    Default

    Joey - you do what you need to do, hon. It is your body. (I think) it is completely normal for you to feel this way.

    I completely understand. I became (and still am) internet obsessed. I have had to feel like I am doing everything in my power to prevent another loss. I guess then I might not blame myself for "failing" (my words, no one elses) . Research has made me feel like I have more control over what is going to happen in my future, rather than the powerlessness I felt when I MC. My FS, on the other hand, did not enjoy my myriad questions I would take to each appointment. "Unplug the internet," he has told me on more than one occasion!

    Oh, and about the stress thing - no study has proved it has stopped conception. It is of course, important not to strees so much once you conceive.

    I am sorry that the closest people in your life are not giving you the type of support you crave, even though I am sure they have the best of intentions. Do what you've got to do, hon'. It is not hurting anybody

  3. #93

    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Caroline Springs
    Posts
    2,341

    Default

    Joey, I totally agree with WTH! You have to do what you feel you need to. I also am internet-obsessed when it comes to TTC and pregnancy. I'm even already looking into things for school age children! I often see my DH's eyes glaze over when I start talking about something I've just learnt, lol! I'm lucky though because he's super-supportive. So maybe just let your family know that the research is what makes you feel more comfortable and at ease, and to just let you continue. Just remember that for every opinion you can find somewhere on the net, there is usually a differeing opionion out there too. You may never find the exact answers you are after, but at least you can make informed decisions and know that you are doing your best for yourself and your future bundle of joy

  4. #94

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    North side, Brisbane
    Posts
    754

    Default

    Hi everyone,

    It's been a few days. I haven't been feeling really well. Threw up early (4am) on Wednesday morning and have been feeling queezy since (no, I'm not preg. Had my blood test on Thursday arvo and hCG was at 2). Did some more painting today on the carport, and have spent the last hour or TWO catching up on what I have missed! Boy oh boy!
    So sorry if my replies are a bit all over the shop. I'm just replying as I read!

    Jenushka - I was the one who was a nana. Welcome to the nana's club!! Where in Hamilton? Not the ritzy part. We're not rich. Wouldn't mind if we were though! We're in walking distance to Bretts Wharf and Portside Wharf. It's lovely, but we don't eat there $$. I'm a bit of a scab when it comes to spending money What hospital are you planning on going to for your bubba? We'll go to the RBH.

    Arcia - I agree with Jen, temping is addictive. Be careful!

    NicksterUK - Hi! Nice to meet you. What is iykwim? Thanks for your feedback. How's your belly going? Congratulations on your pregnancy!!

    Vanaithi & Arcia - I think I'll jump on the banana and carrot banwagon (is that how you spell it??) I pretty much have a banana a day, the carrots are a bit boring, but dipping them in peanut butter helps. The banana and carrot growers will love you!

    Easha - How was your conference. Did you manage to get though it and stay sane?

    KL - Removing a stocking from a dog. Hmmm. Sounds like fun. I think I'll stick with my 10 year olds, even if some of them do have attitudes!! That would be beautiful if your bubba was due on your wedding anniversary!! I'm hoping for that too. Ours is the 5th of April! I don't know when I'll O cause I haven't had AF since mc. Just have to wait and see! Be careful going out nana!! What a hastle, you have to shave your legs. Don't you just hate that! Good on your DH for being the Godfather of Funk! Maybe soon he can be the FATHER of funk too! I like the idea of your Melbourne Meet up. Does anyone know if we have one in Brissy? I know there's a group of those who are preg, but what about a TTC group? It would be nice to be able to chat about it in real person with out boring the others to tears. Happy belated birthday to your mum.
    Glad to hear you had a great night. And well done on showing up the X!! Sounds like you had a really great night. Don't tell me you're leaving the nana's club?!

    Jen - I know what you mean. If AF is going to come, just come already so you can start over again!! I am just reading through all the posts as I send this one (making sure not to miss anyting out), and you mentioned the carrots and peanut butter thing too. They recon that peanut butter is good for you in preg too. ?? So that's handy.

    WTH - I'm sure you couldn't drive us nuts if you tried!

    Tina - Hope your weekend was wonderful, and included lots of BDing

    Smilanatu - No good to hear that Lee is broken. Maybe try a paddle pop stick and some gaffer tape!!

    Tutmae - Hi! I'm Joey. Nice to meet you. And the clairvoyant said TWO babies? How do you feel about twins?

    Tempus Moriendi - Nice to meet you too.

    AJC - Glad to hear you are nearing the end of your 1st trimester. A job well done!

    WTH - THANK YOU!!! If you know what's going on, you feel in control. Thanks for the support. I'm sure they care, they just don't know how to do it the helpful way right now!

    KL - Lucky for you, your DH's eyes just glaze over. Mine looks at me as though I am from another planet! Thanks for the support.

    Hugs to you all. I would go crazy without you all.

    AFM - I need to convince my DH that I am NOT addicted to BB and I am not obsessed with charting and my life does NOT revolve around TTC. Any suggestions on how to do this? All the fuss is turning him off. Noooooooooooo

  5. #95

    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Posts
    1,282

    Default Sounds like you need a hug joey.....

    Joey - it's so frustrating when people say what they think will help but it infact does the opposite. They really don't know what it is like to go through what us ladies in here have been through. That is why I joined BB because the only people who made me feel better were the people in here. Even though i love my DH more than anything, he just didn't have the right words to comfort me. Same with our parents, they care about us so much but they both had two healthy children have no idea what you go through when you have a m/c.

    I started temping after my first m/c. After the d&c my cycle went back to normal straight away but after 4 months when I wasn't pg again I got really stressed and my cycle (which was stricly 29/30 days prior to that) went totally whacko. I convinced myself twice that I was pg when really my cycle was just late. So not only did I experience the frustration of getting af - then realising that we'd bd at the wrong time made matters even worse. I bought my bbt thermometer half way through my cycle but started using it straight away (just prior to O) and I couldn't believe how much it told me about my cycle even when i hadn't been through a whole month. Next month it was a BFP. I bought one of those maybe baby saliva things but it didn't work for me. I also tried opk's but they didn't work either (until I found some midstream ones).

    My temping I felt I was in control of my cycle and at least at the end of each month I knew we'd given i our best shot rather than wonder 'did we bd at the right time' etc. Good luck with it - happy temping.

    Sending you a million

  6. #96

    Join Date
    Oct 2007
    Location
    Caroline Springs
    Posts
    2,341

    Default

    Joey - Never fear! I'm not leaving the nana's club!!! DH is DJ'ing again tonight and tomorrow night and I'm staying at home in my pj's! Actually I work tomorrow night anyway, but even if I wasn't I'd still not be going out hehe.

    Oh, and an update on my legs... I didn't end up shaving them I decided to wear these cute black stockings I have, then when I got dressed at the last moment (as I always do) I decided the stockings didn't match the dress so I took them off. It wasn't until we were sitting at dinner that I realised I was now wearing a dress with a small forest on my legs!!! Luckily the night club is nice and dark and no one was rubbing their hands on my legs (besides DH of course ).

    "paddle pop stick and some gaffer tape" !!!

    Also, check out this forum area for the meet-ups. There are a couple in brissy too!

  7. #97

    Default

    Joey - big big hun. On the stress thing - I had three people tell me to stop stressing and just relax the month I fell pg! My response to each of them was that if "stressing" was that effective at preventing conception they'd tell everyone to stress their heads off and chuck out their contraception!! And around here, its not stressing - its dedication (lol!). If all goes well with this pg I'll be heading to the Mater Mothers Private (aka Mater Mirage).

    Jen - I am so sorry to hear that AF arrived for you and I sincerely hope that you are doing ok. Embrace the grumpiness - just go with it and it can be quite liberating!! Sounds like you are still keeping that chin up though. What an absolute trooper you are. Take it easy, rest up and before you know it, it will be o time and bd fest once again

    wth - how are you doing lovely? How's the symptom analysing going (lol!). I am feeling quite sick which is good, and both bb's are sore, but the left one is more tender - ever heard of that? I haven't! Oh well I'll just go with it.... Any clues on the high prog level from the bt? Any more follow up tests or scans booked?

    krystielove - hope you throughly enjoyed your night out - how cool that your ex was there when you were all glammed up with your gorgeous dh in the dj booth - hehehe! Have fun at the Melb meet up.Thanks also for maintaining the status list for this thread - you're a star

    mollycat - sounds like you had a magical day with your family. I have my fingers crossed for a july bfp for you

    jen and krystielove - I checked out your pics and you both look gorgeous and exactly like I'd imagined - well, pretty close to what I'd imagined anyway I've added mine too...

    belly rubs to plc (12 weeks already - omg!!) and ajc (storming through the first tri!!)

    and of course

    and for all ...

  8. #98

    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    White Gum Valley, WA
    Posts
    318

    Default

    Joey- Aw, hon, it's rough when people don't quite understand. But I'm sure that they're just trying to look out for you. Hubby is probably feeling exactly the same as you- men just seem to keep it a bit quieter than us ladies. Men!

    And, twins? AHHHH! It would be great, but, um, I think I would be just as happy having two with two SEPARATE pregnancies. And with my "morning sickness" as bad as it was with Lilah (dropping 13kg, liver failure, general grossness) I hate to think what it'd be like with two little ones!! That being said- try and get the grin off my face everytime twins is mentioned. Heehee.

  9. #99

    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    California
    Posts
    1,665

    Default

    tutmae--Thanks, hun! Really glad you're back!


    mollycat--Sounds like you had an amazing family day! Your chart looks great, bet you're going to see a coverline any time now! Looks like everyone's in line for a July BFP--lets clear this thread out!


    plc--Oh, man, now I really want to go to the meet-up!! It's so unfair I live too far away! Please take lots of pics for me so I can "be there" with you girls!


    joey--We all understand, hun! Prior to my m/c the only thing I did online was pay bills! There's something about a m/c that makes us crave knowledge, and not only that but we crave the answers as to why this happened: could it have been prevented, did I do something to cause this, where do I go from here, etc... My mind after my m/c was like a slideshow that continually played over and over in my mind, and the only way I could deal with all the images and thoughts was through researching everything I could find on m/c and conceiving after m/c. I must admit it was consuming, but it got me through those dark days! That's how I found this site, and all these amazing women that made me feel completely normal--more than just normal, but accepted! I also learned to accept the fact that my family couldn't get me through this because as much as they tried, they just didn't understand. It's like expecting a woman that's never given birth to appreciate labor and delivery--it's impossible to comprehend until you're there dealing with it! I truly think your family is just at a loss for words on how to comfort you, and in not knowing what the "magic words" are, it's easier for them to just pretend it didn't happen. I'm very lucky that DF now realizes how important this is for me--just yesterday he was saying how cool it was that I'm so connected to the girls here, and how we were all brought together under such heartbreaking circumstances in order to comfort and be there for each other! I think he's just happy to be off the hook--he gets to hear the funny stories about the girls instead of being constantly reminded of the sorrow and pain! As much as I would've wanted to have a healthy pg'cy, I truly feel like I was blessed in a way because I never would've met this amazing group of women! When 1 door closes, another one opens--someday you'll see the connection and you'll realize what you were supposed to learn from this situation. Just tell your family that this is what you need to do to heal and find comfort--show them my post and say, "See! It's not just me, this is healthy and normal!" You need to do what makes you feel better--so tell them I said to leave you the hell alone! ( you know I'm just kidding!) BTW (sorry, by the way) IYKWIM is "If you know what I mean"--it's confusing at first, I know! I agree with jenushka, BB is not an addiction (well, for me it is!), it's dedication! Sending you lots of


    jenushka--Thanks, hun, you're making me Did you picture me with curly hair like Krystie did? lol... The pic of you and DS is amazing--you're beautiful, and DS is SO cute! You look very much like I imagined you would!

  10. #100

    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    White Gum Valley, WA
    Posts
    318

    Default

    I just felt like posting, really. No news for me, except that I told my dad about the calirvoyant thing today and he was actually really happy. Geniunely happy. it was a big surprise!!

    Also, who is next to test? Surely we're due for one more June BFP! Fingers crossed!!

  11. #101

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    North side, Brisbane
    Posts
    754

    Default

    AJC -Thanks so much. I agree. The only people that really understand are the girls in here. You are all life savers Congratulations on your preg!! You must be so excited.

    KL - So glad to hear the nana's club hasn't lost you. I was starting to get worried lol !!

    Jenuska - Thanks for your thoughts - I totally agree. The Mater is supposed to be really good. Well done. We don't have private health cover, so we'll just be povs in the RBH. They were really good with my first pregnancy (a trillion years ago), so I don't mind. Yours will be a little more luxurious though, I am sure. ENJOY!

    Tutmae - well if that's the case. Good luck with those twins that are on the way!!!!

    Jen - sounds like you have a wonderfully understanding DH. Thanks so much for your words. I totally agree with EVERYTHING you have said. And I will tell them, they better watch out, or Jen will be around to see them!!

    AFM - Feeling a lot better this morning. But don't like the idea that I have to do my 'researching' in secret so as to not stress out my DH. After our BDing last night, stuck my legs up the wall and a pillow under my butt, just in case I o any time soon. Hard to tell, my temp is saying not yet, but that's not going to tell me until it's too late anyway. My hCG was at 2 on Monday and Thursday last week, so it's probably wishful thinking that it's dropped to zero and I've dropped an egg already, but whatever!!

    Love you all. Thanks so much for the continual support!! You are the best

  12. #102

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    North side, Brisbane
    Posts
    754

    Default Free Tickets to the Pregnancy, Babies & Children's Expo

    For any of you who are interested, you can get free tickets tothe Pregnancy, Baby & Childrens Expo on this site: Pregnancy, Babies and Childrens Expo

  13. #103

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    U.S.A
    Posts
    186

    Unhappy

    I am signed on here from my cell phone right now so I can't do any personal post I just needed to vent because I had such a bad day ... I got to work and it was baby shower invite in my mailbox which made me kinda sad and then I got home and watch a movie where a baby was being born which made me cry I want to have a baby so bad and right now I just feel like its never going to happen sorry for the sad me post but I just needed to get that out I'm going to bed now wish I could sleep in but I have to work in the am ...

  14. #104

    Join Date
    Jan 2008
    Location
    Melbourne, Australia
    Posts
    1,395

    Default

    Oh Toccara - I know. I just know what you are going thru - it is the most exquisite agony imaginable and you just want to tear up everything in sight with ur teeth and punch a hole in the wall at how unfair the waiting is. It brings tears to my eyes remembering my own pain so clearly in my mind. No one forgets the anguish not even when ur pg. The feeling is just so raw and try as we might to bury it at times and be positive - the feeling is always ready to resurface at any time. I just have to encourage you to be hopeful that it is going to be u one day too honey - ul be such a great "mommy" just hold onto that for what it is worth. Feel what you need to feel but vent it out of ur system as much as possible!!! Hugest hugs imaginable for you sweet!

    Krystielove - after giving it much thought, I am not going to go tomorrow. I am going to pm you.

    Hello everyone else!!!

  15. #105

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    North side, Brisbane
    Posts
    754

    Default

    Dearest Toccara,

    Do you really have to go to work? Why not spend the day in bed? Have a big sleep and find something snuggly to snuggle in with. No words can take away your pain, just know that we are all here for you. And feel free to vent at any time at all.

  16. #106

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    North side, Brisbane
    Posts
    754

    Default

    Jen,

    A new addition for "you know you're addicted to BB when ..."

    Your DH comments that he's your family, not the girls!!

  17. #107

    Join Date
    Jun 2008
    Location
    New Jersey, USA
    Posts
    192

    Default Hi..I'n new here..

    Hi...My name is Ruthie.. I was diagnosed with PCOS on 1999. I had my first son on fertility meds. After him I have become pregnant twice and both ended in miscarriage in the first trimester.
    I have started a round of the same meds to have my first at a higher dose and am in the 2WW! I hope I finally get a BFP.

    I look forward to hear your experiences.

    **baby Dust****

  18. #108

    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    North side, Brisbane
    Posts
    754

    Default

    Hi Ruthie,

    It's sad that you have to be here, but we're glad you have found us. This is such a wonderful place to be when the rest of the world seems cold and hopeless at feeling your pain.

    How old is your son? Do you mind if I ask how far along you were when you MC? How long ago was that?

    I really hope that you only have one 2WW. Fingers crossed for you.

    Here's my story: I am 29, very very close to 30 (in 18 days time), and I have a daughter from a previous marriage. She is one week off 10 years old. She had an idential twin sister who we lost at 1 week old to 'twin to twin transfusion'. One baby was much bigger than the other and took all the goodness, preventing the other from growing. We didn't even know we were having twins until 1 week before the birth as I had been against ultrasounds (not knowing their true affect at that time, I figured I would only have one if I needed one). Dr sent me for a scan at 27 weeks, and after 3 amniocentesis to try and reduce the amount of fluid to allow the little one to grow, I went into labour at 28 weeks. Delivered by c-section, one baby was 1.1kg, the other 470g. One week later, our littlest angel died. The whole time looking back is really a blur. It was so unexpected. We only knew about our second little angel for 2 weeks, one week in my tum and one out.

    I am now remarried (for just over a year) and we are TTC, after a year of actually wanting too, but not having permancy in my job). We had a MC 2 weeks ago (at 5.5 weeks) which was very sad and unfortunate, but my recovery has been speedy thanks to BB. I have ignored doctors orders to wait a month and we are TTC straight away. I have done copious amounts of research and have come to the conclusion that I can't change the bigger plan, we get what we are given, and when it is time for us to have a baby, one will be given to us. So, if indeed we should wait a month, then no matter how hard we try this month, we won't fall. Yet if we were meant to fall pregnant this month, we will. So let's just see what happens. I have no clue as to what my cycle will do. I have read of women who have had to wait 5 months for AF to visit. I have also read that you can ovulate two weeks after MC and conceive, and go on to have a healthy pregnancy. So that's what I'm hoping for!! Will just have to BD every couple of days, and hope the catches the little eggy when she decides to arrive.

    I have been having blood tests since my MC, watching my hCG levels drop. On the day I went into the hospital in fear of MC, by hCG was at 45. Two days later it was at 8, two more days later it was at 3, 5 more days later at 2, and 2 more days later (Wednesday of this week) still at 2. So I'm curious to see how long it will take to get to zero. I'm assuming I won't ovulate until it gets to zero. Perhaps you know the answer to this?

    SO ... after all that ... again. I hope we can all be of help to you. Any time you need to chat. Log on. There are many beautiful women on this site who will help you get through any dark times you may (but hopefully won't) have.

    Love Joey

Page 6 of 11 FirstFirst ... 45678 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •