Well the sun is shining in Adelaide today...so its kind of hard to feel miserable.

I lost my dad when I was 13. My mum keeps trying to help by telling me that I got through that so I can get through this, but its just not the same. When I lost my dad there was a definite void, a personality to miss, but I had lots of memories to cherish too. Losing a baby at 10 weeks just isn't like that. There is no physical void. Since this was my first pregnancy, in many ways our life is just as it was before I was pregnant. But I'm not the same. I think I'm taken by suprise at how quickly I felt like a mother. And just as quickly, I'm not one.

Anyway, it took me 8 years to really deal with my dad's death. Even now I think I'm still dealing with it. I guess you kind of absorb the experience so that it becomes a part of you. There's no putting it behind you. Over time the ache gradually fades. Its only been 5 weeks since I lost my little one (I'm sure he was a boy). I just need to give myself time.

I'm so grateful to you all and BB for giving me a place where I can talk about it with people who understand.