Is your partner as well informed as you?

[Inanna]

Aaaah now that's opened up a whole other can of worms! Who has the final say - when the child is from you both but is still in the Woman's body????

I know you are not angry & you bring up good points Slyder - I honour your knowledge & commitment.

Slyder - I certainly don't think men are dopey & sit in the corner. I didn't say that nor infer it. I have observed men (& in fact birthing partners/support persons who are female) who just want to take the pain away. So, instead of trusting in the process & understanding it - they try to kindly and compassionately "save" their loved one...

I also know that there are many men who are wonderful, strong & passionate birth partners & advocates. However, that comes with much education, information & understanding. Some women are stating that their partners don't inform themselves... In this case or in the case where a couple are not in sync with regard to birthing rights, rites & process I am suggesting that it can be better for them not to be present...

Just as if a man was fully into homebirthing - perhaps he was birthed at home or he observed siblings being birthed at home... It would be perhaps obscure & uncomfortable for him to fully support a partner who elects for a c/section... Just throwing that into the mix...

As for who has the final say... I have to say I personally believe that it is my body & I will decide. I think personally it is unacceptable for a partner to expect his wishes for a birth to be thrust upon me. That is largely because I believe it is my right to birth as I believe is safe & correct for me with that birth. I also believe that birth is a rite of passage - it is more than a physical separation from my fetus - it is a sacred event that is integral to my journey as Woman...
I couldnot, would not and have not deferred those decisions to my partner or anyone else. Of course discussion, thoughts & fears are discussed - but in the end my body, birthing my child is my right & my rite... A rite that my partner can join with & share but ultimately birthing my children is Woman's Business (to me)