FionaS - thanks so much for sharing....I would have gone C/S for sure! And I can imagine 6 weeks of discomfort would have been easier than months and years of rehabilitation.
I was the same, my tear took ages and ages to heal and everything suffered because of it....IYKWIM

Thanks everyone for sharing your stories and wisdom....hearing that other's have had similar experiences with friends and judgement makes me sad. Maybe it's just me but I would never comment on how someone chooses to birth it's such an individual thing!

I have also talked it over with DH and there is so much to consider. DS's birth really effected him too. He was a wonderful supportive husband but the whole ordeal with exhausting and upsetting for him and I also have him to consider in this equation.