Hi Samm,

I'm in similar basket, I really agonised over the fact that the fertiliser was unwilling. I was and still am upset that he couldn't just say "O.K". When you are searching for peace, look for it in the 'things I can't control' folder. Distance is the safest bet. You are in two different places about this and right now you have inly enough space to look after you and the babe. He's an adult and can look after himself. Dont write things or say things you might regret - write them but DONT send them, they will haunt you and you WILL be emotional about this. acknowlege what he has to say, but dont let him drum you over the head with his opinion, get the gist, then GET OUT of there. I've had 2 experiences with 2 different men 'friends', unfortunately I miscarried one AND I let him get under my skin about HIS pain. You know you are on your own now, get the support from ANYWHERE and EVEYWHERE EXCEPT HIM, the dissapointment can be excruciating. They joy of parenting is sublime. Life gives just as it takes away, try not to mourn what you don't have and stay focussed on ALL the POSITIVES. I'm cheering for you!