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Thread: TTC after Recurrent Miscarriage/Stillbirth or Loss after the first trimester

  1. #109

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    Thanks Deb - that's why I write down my thoughts in here, it somehow helps to know people are thinking "yep, know how that feels" rather than just thinking I am some big nutcase.


  2. #110

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    No, you're not a nutcase... You're a woman in pain. You're a woman who wants to be pregnant again.
    Can you go out today and do something wonderful for you... A massage, a pedicure, a coffee and cheesecake???

  3. #111

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    No unforunately not - I was meant to go to work today but called in sick but DH had to go to work and I said he could take the car so I am stuck at home (we sold our 2nd car last week). Dad just called to say hi but I find that hard cause I always pretend everything is fine, for starters he doesnt want to be hearing about my periods and secondly he gets really worried if I am upset and then he tells mum and she worries. Maybe I will call my sister, she usually has a knack of pulling me out of my misery. Otherwise I will just play a pc game or sleep, yeah sleeping is always good.

    Thanks again Deb

  4. #112

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    Hey Mel

    I am so sorry that AF showed up. You are totally human to be so upset and the devastation you are feeling is totally natural. I hope this AF is a little kinder to you than the last.

    We both know that this TTC journey will be bumpy, but just know that I am here to walk that path with you. Please let me know if there is absolutely anything I can do. If you need an friend to listen to you, cry with you, whinge with you then I'm your gal.

    :hugs: to you babe,

    Hang in there

  5. #113

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    Thanks Spring - A bit of a change from talking to me last night huh. It's awful how these "moods" just hit you and there is no warning or prediction, they just come. I would like to ring Michael and ask him to come home but it's only a few hours, and I his work have been really good so far that I don't want to seem like we are taking advantage of them. I will just keep myself occupied on here and listen to some music, I am sure time goes by pretty quickly and before I know it he will be on the way home and I will be thinking oops I havent started organising anything for dinner - he is used to that, I am not the most domestic person.

  6. #114

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    P.S. About AF's kindness - I think it is already being a little kinder, no major cramping or bloatedness, just a heavy feeling which is normal so if it stays this way I won't complain too much.

  7. #115

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    I'm glad AF is a little kinder to you this time, but if you want to whinge and moan about her then go for it...

    I know how you feel about wanting DH there. I have become so dependant on my DH, clingy you would even say and this is coming from a girl who spends months living alone when DH is away with the Army. I think after what you have experienced as a couple, it is hard when you are alone. Hopefully he will be home before you know it, and if you don't get anything ready for dinner you can always whip up a pitta bread pizza (lol)

    I agree with Flowerchild, you deserve to pamper yourself, do you have a close girlfriend who could come over and give you a massage or paint your nails? Even just take a long hot shower and sit down with your favourite book, hell a packet of Tim Tams is the medicine I prescribe. I will send those SANDs newsletters to you today so hopefully you will get them tomorrow or the next day.

    Thinking of you hun, DH and I are going out to see the new Bond movie this arvo so I will pop in later to see how you are.


    Mwah
    Kristy

  8. #116

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    Thanks heaps for that Kristy (I was calling you Spring cause I didn't know if you used your name on BB, lol) - I have decided what I am going to do today... I am going to sit down and listen to all of the songs I have that make me cry. I have decided that maybe that is what I need, just a big huge cry and instead of trying to hold it in maybe it is healthier to let it out and if music helps then that's what I will do. At the moment it is Matchbox 20 - Hand Me Down (dont know if you know it but it always makes me cry, I am such a sad sack its probably not even that sad but it is in my head, hehe). I might have a bit of a play on my guitar after that cause it relaxes me.

    Enjoy the movie, have some popcorn for me (she says drooling).

    Thanks for everything, Mel

  9. #117

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    Oooooooooooooh, and Michael just text me to say he is taking me to Pancake Parlour for dinner - I love Pancake Parlour (I swear I am just like a big kid) and he knows that always cheers me up

    ...But still enjoy some popcorn for me, can't beat fresh popcorn (OMG, I sound like Homer Simpson, lol)

  10. #118
    clare076 Guest

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    Mel, aka homer. So sorry to hear AF has arrived, Big hugs to you sweety. I sometimes feel much better after a good cry too. oh and a big bar of chocolate, but pancake parlour sounds awfully good right now.

    Deb, how are you? Did you end up o'ing over the weekend. Fingers crossed, I hope you got in plenty of baby dancing just in case.

    Spring, how's it all going? hope you are keeping well

    Me, concentrating less on baby making and more on weight loss at the moment. I figured if I try loose a little weight I am bound to get pregnant straight away and put it all back on. lol I have totally given up on those stupid OPK's, I have no idea if I had a surge or not, they were starting to get darker, almost as dark as control line and now nothing. So I am assuming I either am not about to o or I have missed the surge. Still feeling blah.

    Take care all
    x

  11. #119

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    HI Gorgeous women!!!!
    Clare: OPK's can be frustrating little sticks... However, if your line was almost as dark as the control I would most certainly take that as your surge. So get to thee bed my woman!!!
    When I am not on clomid my surge is very hard to detect. I never got a true positive.
    Because the clomid increases the LH I get a nice big fat dark line...
    Today I got an almost positive so tomorrow I imagine will be my positive.
    I talked to my obs via email yesterday as I still hadn't had a positive yesterday. She asked me to come back in to check on my follie. Soooo off I went for yet another peek oday... My follie is 30mm. For a follie that is BIG! So, she said if it doesn't release any minute she'll go to work at the coles checkout... I am achy so I am thinking that that follie will release an egg within the next 24 hours.

    I hope you enjoyed the movie Spring.

    Mel ; I am so happy to hear you are off to the Pancake Parlour. That's a sure fire way to put a smile on. Thinking of you Mel

  12. #120

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    Hey ladies

    Well the movie was Ok. We saw the new Bond. DH really loved it and he was really looking forward to it so that made me happy. To be honest my mind was wandering the entire time so I can't really tell you much about it and DH spent the whole drive home trying to explain it to me. I myself am not a pop-corn gal, I prefer the choc top... I always finish them before the darn movie even starts (lol) The pancake parlour sounds like the perfect medicine Mel. I have only ever been to a pankcake parlour once so maybe I have to go again, don't know what I missing hey. I hope it puts a smile on your dial I totally understand listening to music. I think that if you can let it all out then go for it babe. Songs take on a whole new meaning when you are going through something traumatic. On the way to the movie we heard the new Powderfinger song "Say you'll watch over me" (don't know if that is the exact name). I had never really paid much attention to the lyrics before but I must admit it really touched me and I shead a tear.

    Clare, I am with you on the trying to lose weight thing. I know how many temptations there are at this time of year but I know you can do it. I have about 10kgs excess but I am just trying to lose it slowly. I have done crazy diets before and lost 20Kgs in 3 months but I am trying to take care of myself so that I am the peak baby making condition. I promise that choc top was the last one (lol)

    Flowerchild, you seem to be the master of all things O so I am sure that you know better than anyone when those little girls get released so BD away

  13. #121

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    I wish I was the Master of all things o!LOL!!!
    I am sending you a big big hug Spring
    I agree go the choc top!
    We are going Christmas shopping in *the big smoke* aka Brisbane on the weekend - just my husband and I. We are going to stay overnight and movies are on the evening agenda - I know Chris will be angling for the new Bond - I must admit I am not a fan of Bond movies. However after succeeding in getting him to the shops I will just have to grin and bear it!!!

  14. #122
    clare076 Guest

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    Deb, thanks for that info. The OPK that was almost as dark as the control I assumed was the start of something so having been baby dancing ever since. That was about 3 days ago. I still am not sure If I am using them correctly so didn't want to mess around just in case.

    LOL at you ob working at coles. She is obviously pretty sure of herself.

    Spring, I have been trying to loose weight now for 3 weeks, and lost 4.4kg so far so really excited. I joined WW 3 days before I got my BFP with Max, so hoping it has the same effect this time. Mind you a choc top sounds lovely right now. And what types of pancakes can you get at pancake parlour? That sounds interesting too.

  15. #123

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    It sounds like you would have covered it Clare. I hope so. So, you and I are at a similar time in our cycle... Wouldn't it be wonderful to both have some good news to spread in the next 10 days or so!!!
    My obs is an absolute dag. She is incredibly down to earth - she doesn't take appts on Monday mornings as that is school morning (she's a mum). I really like that she is so unassuming yet very knowledgeable and open to debate. It's early days with her but so far I really love what I see.
    I am glad we got this cycle sorted as next cycle she will be away on holidays... She has me stocked up with path forms, referrals etc so I can go through my next cycle (if I have one!) without her.

    Yay on the weight loss Clare - that's just great!!!

    Spreading vibes everywhere!!!

  16. #124

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    Clare - 4.4kgs in three weeks is excellent!!! I have done WW previously and still have all the books so might give it a try again. Do you know if it is safe to do while TTC? I remember that there was too much to eat. Sounds silly I know but I found at the end of the day if I had points left over I thought I could use them up with a glass of wine. Perhaps that is why I didn't go so well (lol)

    Flowerchild, it is great when you have a ob that you can trust and is knowlegeable beyond what they have to know. It must make those dreaded trips to docs office that little bit more bearable. I have always been petrified of hospitals ( I had 3rd degree burns and operations/skin grafts when I was two) and after everything that has happened with Harrison, I faint at even the mention of the docs. Big sook I know.

    Well me, not holding out much hope for a BFP this month. AF is due on Friday but since this is my first cycle since I had Harrison I am not sure if it will be longer than 28 days. I did a HPT this morning and it was BFN. I keep telling myself though that I didn't get a BFP with the twins until I was 5 weeks. If and when AF comes to visit, I am going to buy OPK and get to know my cycle. I have had some nausea over the last few days but I didn't have one day of ms with Harry so I don't know what to expect. I think it is more an upset tummy though but I won't gross you all out with the going ons of my tummy To be honest because I don't have my hopes up I think I will be OK if AF arrives, I am probably fooling myself but today I feel OK so I am going to enjoy it while it lasts.

    Well my gorgeous ladies, DH is on holidays at the moment so we are going to try to get some of the jobs we have been putting off in the garden done before Summer really hits.

    I'll pop in later to say hi

    Mwah
    Spring Angel

  17. #125
    clare076 Guest

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    Morning all
    Deb I wish the ob I saw was as good as yours, but I suppose that's what I get for going public! Mind you my GP is fantastic, she is pregnant herself so she understands what we are going through. She nearly cried when I told her I had lost Max, very sweet.
    I still don't think I have o'd yet, but it will be any day that I am sure of. Still feeling really achy and pukey so hopefully that temp will jump up tomorrow. I have my mum staying with us from Thursday and DP wont DTD while she is in the house, so it better be soon

    Spring WW has changed quite a bit since I first joined, if you do points it goes on saturated fat instead of total fat, I do the no count and as far as I know it is perfectly safe to do while TTC. WW is great because you are eating sensible, and not cutting anything out of your diet. My GP knows I am doing it and she said it was OK.

    Me - I have just finished cleaning the house. I have had DP home for 4 days and you can imagine the mess he left behind. I cant wait to just O so we can stop bding - so over it.
    Spring, if you dont get your BFP this month you are welcome to my stupid OPK's!!! I think I will just stick to temping.

    Have a good day girls
    MWAH

  18. #126

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    Clare,
    I would say when that line was as close as the control that that was it. Have they lightened up since then or do they continue to be dark???

    I nearly gave up on opk's too when I first started using them. I found them frustrating as I would dip away for days with only feint lines. I found though in time that I ovulated much later than I thought.
    I also found for me (and of course we're all different) I only ever got a shade lighter than the control. I also found that to get a true positive I needed to test twice daily. However, in time I learned that close to positive for me was a positive so I didn't need to test as often... Just initially when I was learning about how my body was reacting... We know I ovulated when I suspected I had because my cd21progesterone level was congruent with ovulation having occured when I calculated by my "nearly positive" opk.

    I also found that the supermarket brand was more difficult to get a positive than the ones I buy from Lullaby. What brand are you using???
    I HEAR you sister about being over the bd fest. It becomes a bit mechanical doesn't it? However, my husband is off to work each day with a smile on his dial so that's a good thing!

    My news is.....I GOT A POSITIVE OPK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOOOOOOO HOOOOOOOO!!!!!!
    So, it looks like I have another two days of getting jiggy with it!!!!!

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