Hi all,

The "unstable" one is back - feeling a little bit better. I feel totally exhausted tonight though, the kids didnt come tonight. DH thought it was best for me and them if they stay with their Mum tonight and he will get them in the morning. Surprisingly she was pretty cool about it. So I am going to have a quiet night and make myself feel better for tomorrow. DH was going to cancel the whole weekend but I said that is unfair. He rang and spoke to them and told them I wasnt well, so the 6 year old got really worried cause he thought that meant I was in hospital and when it was explained I wasnt his next question was "is it anything I can catch" LOL... KIDS!

Michelle - Thank you so much for responding to me, I feel just the way you said you did. And it is sometimes just comforting to know that I am "normal". When you said about feeling like a failure, it really does echo my own feelings. I feel like a failure when I have to explain to people that my baby died, I feel like a failure everyone my MIL gets teary and says she is having a sad day, I feel like a failure everytime DH's kids say they have a brother but he died, and overall I feel like a failure every time AF shows up. Did they find any reason as to why it was taking so long for you to conceive? I only ask cause everyone keeps saying to me to relax and it will happen but I feel like it is impossible to relax as I just feel tense all the time, especially during the Oing time. I am sorry to hear that you had such a hard day on Caitlyn's 2nd anniversary, I think those days will always come... even when we are old and grey I think it will still hurt. Knowing you have that healthy beautiful bub growing steadily in your tummy does give me some hope, thanks again.

Spring - I am so happy your scan was good and that lil Spring is kicking and punching away, wont be long and you will be able to feel all that activity and it will be the best feeling in the world As soon as you can pick some pics you will have to try and scan them and email them to me so I can see him/her.

Lynn - Thanks again for your support, or should I say as usual You and I are feeling such similar emotions at the moment and as you said you can also relate to Michelle's post. I am glad to hear I am not a weirdo sitting down listening to these songs, but as far as the guitar I am not the best guitarist but I know how to play around a little and it does give me some enjoyment, although because I dont play often enough can be tough on little fingertips. I hope you are feeling ok today and that trying to smile has helped you a little :hugs:

Hope everyone else is well, and Deb I am still thinking of you and hope you are ok.

Mel