We risk becoming like child protection services if we only see fit to broach something if it's a physical threat to a child. If a child is fed and clothed and not physically abused, a child is not deemed to be under threat. If that child is ignored, sent to childcare so that the parents dont' have to engage emotionally with him or her, relegated quite obviously in favour of another child, it just doesn't register as important. That child's psychological wellbeing just doesn't rate because we can't SEE it happening. Yet that psychological wellbeing will affect the child's adulthood as much, of not more profoundly, than physical circumstances, if the physical doesn't already compound the psychological.
Watching a child's face as it crumbles, watching that child crumble inside, not knowing anymore WHAT he can do to be accepted by his father except lash out and say over and over again, like a mantra, that he hates his father and wishes he could kill him (the child was 5 at the time and otherwise a sweet, imaginative kid) is not something I like to just sit back and reserve judgment on. In this instance (this really happened), the mother was crying and saying she didn' tknow what to do, knowing that she didn't have the strength to stand up for the child whilst it was happening and not knowing how to respond to the child once it had already happened. I took this as an invitation to advise, and advised her to be all the love she could be so that at least her son would know who he could turn to. Only, she can't do this properly, either, because her DH becomes infantile when she doesn't 'support' him and she's left on her own - cold-shouldered and belittled ("you're just like your mother", he'll say to the boy) by her husband and distrusted by her son for her ability to protect his spirit. When you feel your own heart cracking into little pieces watching this happen before your eyes, I defy you to keep your 'judgment' to yourself about something that won't land a kid in hospital
Honestly, if you can grab a copy of The Natural Child and read its chapter on standing up for children, it might change the way you react to these situations.
So, yes, there are times I do judge parenting, and not because they're not parenting like I would, but because they're parenting in a way that is harming their child, in visible ways, or internalised ways.