Maybe I just used the wrong words? Talking back to me in a way that is disrespectful is not on, and I don't talk to them that way either. But telling me how they feel even if it's to disagree with me or tell me that I've done something that they think is wrong is totally ok with me and welcomed.
Yeah maybe it's just the wording. "Talking back" has such a negative connotation to me, it seems weird to celebrate it. It seems what you are celebrating is her speaking her feelings in a respectful way? Of course that is OK! Defiance or disrespect isn't.