Oh wow, I don't know what to say.

Thank you all so much.

I have admired and respected a lot of you for so long, and to be getting such amazing support and advice and wisdom is such a huge privilege.

I can honestly say that things are changing for me - and that's all because I feel OK about my feelings. I don't like them...but they are there, and beating myself up for having them was only making the whole thing worse.

Oh, and i bought some preggy shorts and tops - they aren't so bad...and they are a whole lot more comfy than my old clothes

It was hard to write the first post - but by doing it a huge weight has been lifted from my shoulders - and i am eternally grateful to you guys for not judging me and for helping me to make sense of this. Thank you so much!