Well, looks like a change of plans ... and i don't want to sound cruel saying this as we are not ' close ' friends ' as such, she is someone i have known since my DD was 4mths old & her & my DD adore each other but i have found since she has been pregnant she doesn't seem to want my help in anyway ... i have had health issues since last December and when i went in for surgery this January she didn't even bother to ring me before going in to hospital let alone ask me anything when i came home to recover like as if nothing happened ... and since my OP she hasn't asked me not once how i am cause i have told her i have had complications since the surgery and am going to have my 3rd lot of blood tests this week and hopefully find the GP will find more answers next Wed when i get the results.

I find whenever i ring her now she doesn't want to hear anything about me yet i have to listen to every single detail about her pregnancy (which she whinges about alot, keeping in mind she was the one who decided to put two eggs in with IVF and it was her second go within months, so she took that chance of being pregnant with twins ... and she very well knows DP & I have been trying TTC #2 bub for 3years and she know we can no longer have another child) ... she doesn't stop to think about the details she tells me like for example when her DD (who is same as my DD) when they go out shopping and hear babies crying how she & her DD talk about them have ' babies ' in their house soon and how wonderful it will be. Then she asks me if i think that's lovely and i do at first but then i can't escape the thought that i will NEVER have that conversation with my own DD as we are no longer able to have another child. And when ever i visit (which i hardly do now) the entire visit is talking about what she has bought for the nursery, and she has to show me everything and then she whinges the whole time about being pregnant. Every 5mins she is rubbing her pregnant belly looking at me.

I don't want her & her DH to be walking on egg shells with my DP & but at least hold back with some things, if anything i'm actually happy she feels she can share the joy with us but at times it starts to weigh very heavy on our hearts listening to every detail at every visit or if we run into them or if we talk on the phone.

I know it's not just me as my DP recently said he feels even he can't go visit them until the babies are born as it's getting to him. He like me said of course the conversation of the twins is to be spoken about and we wouldn't want it to be any other way and we are so darn happy for them as we know the emotional pain we have been through in trying for another baby. But it becomes far too much for my DP & i when clearly her & her DH are clearly not bothering to think about our situation and how sensitive some topics can be ... they just don't seem to care about how we feel let alone truly care about our situation. We were there for them every step of the way with their two attempts of IVF but they have never asked us once how we are with our own 3year TTC journey which has sadly come to an end and they KNOW that.

So ladies i hope i don't sound insensitive or harsh in any way, i just know DP & i could never do what they are doing to another couple in our situation ... in fact i know that cause when i was pregnant with our DD we were around our SIL who didn't know if she could have children and we never spoke about my pregnancy, i sat with my pregnant belly talking about other subjects, as we didn't want to appear to glot or hurt her in anyway.

Anyway, on that note ladies ... the most i will do is give her some meals to freeze after the babies are born and always offer to babysit her DD when need be ... i think that's still helping her ... and keep my eye out in OP shops for anything she say's she short of in baby clothing etc ... DO YOU LADIES THINK THAT'S OK & ENOUGH TO HELP HER ???

Thanks again ladies for all your help & in put, hope you can put yourselves in my shoes and understand where i am coming from with this post.