I feel like I am useless as a mother!

my eldest DS is a lazy so and so and is just taking us for a ride, doesn't look for work, goes out and stays out till all hours of the morning etc, can't kick him out though as he has no where to go and that would stress me out even more. DS#2 is feeling a little jealous, I got very emotional yesterday when he told DH that he didn't want me and Oliver to come out for the family day yesterday. And Oliver has been VERY unsettled all day today, he only goes down for 1 sleep cycle, then wakes up again and screams, I have a massive headache and just feel like I am going to snap/explode.