If I were in your shoes I would def go the CS. No question.

My vaginal birth was a little traumatic too (long 1st stage, prolonged 2nd stage, episiotomy, tear, shoulder distocia & vac extraction) even though I'd gone into labour spontaneously. I did not have any of the problems you had post birth (back to normal 3 weeks later) yet I still think I'd be leaning towards CS if I found myself UTD again.

I think you've done extremely well to face your fears and actually get pregnant again, it's something I just can't face even though I'd love another child and my clock is well and truly ticking.