Hilarious Video: What Would Happen If Men Could Breastfeed?

Hilarious Video: What Would Happen If Men Could Breastfeed?

What If Men Could Breastfeed?

We live in a male-dominated society. We shouldn’t, because most of us are women, but we do. The world is controlled by men, designed with men in mind and things function to the benefit of men.

The world would no doubt be a completely different place if men had to deal with half of the crap nature throws at women.

If men had periods, we wouldn’t see censored sterile blue ‘periods’ on sanitary towel adverts, instead we’d be hearing arguments over who had the heaviest flow. Women’s ‘problems’ would be badges of honour for men.

A hilarious new video from Buzzfeed captures just how different the world would be if men could breastfeed.

Think about, if it was men doing the lactating, you wouldn’t catch a single one of them hiding away in a toilet cubicle for fear of being accused of being sexual.

Oh no, they’d be out in public, proudly breastfeeding without a second thought. Cafe staff wouldn’t be suggesting they cover up or ushering them into back rooms.

In the comic video, we see a dad pumping breastmilk during a staff meeting. During the meeting, the boss takes a moment to congratulate the dad for doing it all and we see his colleagues give a round of applause. It’s unlikely this has happened to many pumping mamas in the workplace.

There’s also a great shot of two competitive dads arguing over who has the best supply. The showing off culminates in the dads trying to shoot their breastmilk the furthest (come on, you know you’ve been tempted to do this to impress your breastfeeding mama friends from time to time).

Whereas there is an assumption that everything coming out of women’s bodies is gross (period blood and breastmilk to name but two), men simply don’t seem to worry about the same things. If men produced breast milk, it would be something to show off about.

They would happily squirt it down the driveway to show off to their friends. Wouldn’t the world be just a little bit better if women could feel as confident, proud and amazed by their own breast milk?

That’s not to say you need to hold a squirt off with your mama friends, but maybe next time you feel embarrassed or worried about breastfeeding in public, simply remember how different the world would be if men could breastfeed.

Isn’t it time we all started breastfeeding like men?

Recommended Reading: For even more cheeky hilarity, check out the video If Making Love Was Treated Like Birth.


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Fiona Peacock is a writer, researcher and lover of all things to do with pregnancy, birth and motherhood (apart from the lack of sleep). She is a home birth advocate, passionate about gentle parenting and is also really tired.

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