“I knew one day I’d have to face some stillbirths, but never did I think it would be so soon. I was in a stunned state for most of the labour, questioning some things, but they always had an answer and I felt I had no definitive knowledge with which to argue. You feel so useless too.” Would you know what to say or do if your client had a stillbirth?
- Are you prepared for the possibility that a client may have a stillbirth or miscarriage?
- Do you have the tools, training or knowledge about what to do next?
- How little or much should you do for a client who has had a stillbirth?
- What about you – how do you cope?
If you’re a doula or doula in training or if you work with pregnant and birthing women, BellyBelly.com.au and StillBirthday.com have recorded an invaluable online information session on ‘miscarriage, stillbirth & the doula.’
“It is easy to become frozen and not know what to do next. Sometimes you can find yourself coming home at 3 am filled with sadness.” — Vickie, Doula
Has Your Training Prepared You For The Possibility Of A Stillbirth?
Many doulas feel that there is not enough learning done during doula training to prepare them for the possibility of a stillbirth – and no-one agrees more than those who have already been in the position of needing to support a grieving family. “Training hardly touched on bad outcomes. I had experience and counselling skills before I did my training… I dread to think how new doulas manage.” — Vickie, Doula
No doula would ever want their client to experience a miscarriage or loss, but unfortunately, some of us find ourselves supporting women and their partners through the grief of losing their dear babies. At the same time, as a doula you may be struggling to hold yourself together, let alone the bereaved family. Don’t tell yourself that it ‘won’t happen to you’… be prepared – not just for your family, but for YOU.
Be As Best Prepared And The Best Support You Can Be
Experts from multiple disciplines in birth and bereavement care have found Stillbirthday’s training to be the best, most comprehensive training on all subjects within birth and bereavement. Fortunately for us, SBD’s founder, Heidi Faith, is giving an hour of her time on her birthday to share some fantastic advice.
You’ll hear about:
- Differences and similarities in responses to loss in hospitals and at home.
- How the doula has a unique role in either situation.
- What a doula’s role might look like in birth in any trimester.
- How to support women who endure miscarriages and have hired you early on in their pregnancy, where you only have short term relationships with them.
- Supporting a client who endures a stillbirth.
- Supporting subsequent pregnancies for families touched by loss.
- Why it’s important for the you, the doula, to have your own support, and some places and ways you can locate it.
What Do Doulas Say That Have Attended Stillbirths?
“I am so glad a program like this is being offered! It should be part of our doula training. My training briefly touched on it but not as in depth as it needed to be.”
“It took a while to process what happened. Actually quite a few months and my friend and I still talk about it a lot and it was over 3 years ago. It took quite a bit of time for all the still births to process. I think we talked about it [stillbirth, while training], but I don’t think anything can really prepare you for it until you are in it.”
Check Out Our Articles Just For Doulas
For information and articles written just for doulas, check out our section Just For Doulas