Ohhh Heaven Please don't let the someone else's story turn you off writing your own story!! Sure our experiences are all similar, but its not exactly the same.

DS was just under 19 months when DD1 was born - and until then he was the biggest mummy's boy you could imagine!! The first 3 months after bringing DD1 home was the hardest, i was dealing with some serious emotions - disappointment at not getting a VBAC, blame towards her because she wouldn't come out on time - plus being exhausted, dealing with an infection in my uterus - and a boisterous toddler - it was bloody hard!

DS wasn't a bad toddler in the slightest really, would only really need a "uh ah" when he was touching something he wasn't supposed to be - and that didn't change. The only thing that changed was yes, he was getting into trouble for being too loud, or pulling the baby too hard on the leg whilst feeding or slamming a book on her head because he wanted to be read to! But - he learnt how to be gentle, how to be considerate and how to wait his turn. I don't think these are bad lessons to learn?

The first couple of months are the hardest, but in reality - its such a short period of time in the whole time you are a mother. And really when you think about it - the first couple of months are hard no matter whether this is your first, second or 6th baby! There is an initial adjustment period for all babies, they have to get to know you - you have to get to know them! All babies have that adjustment period - ALL of them.

I don't think DS has missed out on anything really from having a sibling brought into his life. Really, I haven't taken anything from him - yes he doesn't get 100% of my attention 100% of the time, but the quality of our time together now is better, because I know he doesn't get a lot of it. So he may have to share, but when its just me and him he really enjoys it and makes the most out of it. And it was the same when DD1 was just born, we would do special things like special morning tea when DD1 was sleeping. We would play puzzles, or read special books cuddled up on the couch or on the beanbag - he would get all my time when I had it. Housework fell behind, but I didn't care - I just did it all at night when they were both sleeping.

It doesn't have to be all bad you know, and if you keep it in mind that you are giving her a gift that nobody else in the world can give her, its not too bad. Do you know how bloody awesome I feel when DS tells me that DD1 is his best friend? His BEST friend. I DID THAT. I created a little person who is now his best friend!! Nobody else did, but ME.

So try and not look for negatives at the situation, look towards what you will be giving her rather than what you might be taking away. Because even when you are with a new baby, you can still spend time with her, if your feeding she can sit beside you for a story. If you are trying to get a baby to sleep, sling them and dance around the house with your toddler. There are lots of things you can do at the same time, you'll find this out I'm sure

Try not to stress about something that hasn't happened yet - or may never happen.