Is there anything better than sniffing the addictive scent of your newborn baby’s head as he sleeps on your chest? No.
Having a newborn baby take a nap on you is truly one of the greatest pleasures known to mothers. While your little one is catching up on some much-needed sleep (hey, it’s not easy being a night owl), you can soak up the perfection of your new baby and enjoy some rest time yourself.
Contact napping isn’t just for newborns; you can continue contact napping with babies as they grow. Sure, they’ll get heavier, and you might suffer from the occasional dead arm from the weight of your toddler’s head, but there’s nothing wrong with letting your toddler nap on you.
What is contact napping?
Contact napping is the maternal art of letting your baby fall asleep on you. Simply put, it means remaining physically connected to your child even when napping. You might be feeding your baby on the sofa only to find he dozes off; instead of trying to transfer him to a separate sleep surface, you simply let him sleep in your arms.
As a new mom, you’ll have a secure way to bond with your little one during nap time. Not only does contact napping (skin-to-skin) provide comfort in a warm embrace for your baby, but studies show contact napping releases oxytocin, the ‘love hormone’, in you and your newborn.
A 2019 literature review concluded that ‘oxytocin plays an important role in the development of attachment between infants and parents through early contact and interaction’.
Benefits of contact napping
A 2020 article published in Infant Behavior & Development found many benefits of mother-infant contact:
‘For infants, these include sleep organization, temperature and heart rate regulation, behavioral response, crying/colic, socio-emotional development, attachment quality, speech development opportunities and mother-child interactions. For mothers, studies demonstrate improved depressive symptomatology, physiological stress regulation, contingent responsivity, breastfeeding, and mother-child interactions’.
There are numerous benefits to contact naps, such as:
1. Physical contact
Touch and physical contact are vital for healthy development. Sadly, opportunity for touch is limited in modern Western society. Consider the time your baby spends in a car seat, pram and bouncer each day and the nighttime sleep hours in a crib.
These hours amount to missed opportunities for touch but many might be essential. For example, you need to put your baby down to make dinner or play with your older child, and a car seat is non-negotiable because it keeps your baby safe. Contact naps are an easy way to boost the contact time you and your baby enjoy together daily.
2. Bonding time
While your baby sleeps, you’ll enjoy quality bonding time with your gorgeous little bundle. Although we might think of bonding time as eye contact and meaningful conversations, in fact, physical closeness is enough to encourage bonding with your baby. Physical contact promotes the release of oxytocin, the love hormone, and helps you bond with your infant.
Being present in your baby’s sleep space, even if you’re scrolling on social media, allows you to feel physically close to your baby and enjoy the physical regulation provided by being in close proximity. You might find your heart rate slows, as your baby’s does, and your breathing might be in sync.
3. Promotes paternal bonding
Contact napping isn’t just for mothers; fathers can benefit from this parenting highlight, too. It’s important your partner has plenty of time to bond with the baby. As a 2021 study investigating paternal touch with six-month-old infants found:
‘Results are consistent with previous work showing that physical touch, particularly playful proprioceptive touch, is associated with higher oxytocin levels in fathers‘.
Contact naps are another way to promote paternal-infant touch, boost oxytocin and encourage bonding.
4. Improved sleep quality
Many parents find contact naps lead to improved baby sleep quality. Whereas babies sleeping alone might be startled and wake fully on discovering they are alone, a baby in your arms might fall back asleep more easily if disturbed during a nap.
5. Convenience
With contact naps, you don’t need to risk waking him if your baby falls asleep in your arms. There’s no transfer for crib naps; you don’t need to ensure you’re near your baby’s crib at nap time each day. You are your baby’s sleep space, so your baby can nap wherever you are.
6. Reduced pressure
So many new mothers take on the bulk of the housework while juggling the demands of motherhood. Just because you’re on maternity leave doesn’t mean you need to do everything. Many new parents get their babies to sleep independently so they can catch up on housework while the baby naps.
Instead, how about taking that time for yourself? Contact napping also carves out some rest time for you, so you can read a book or listen to the podcast you never got around to. Your house doesn’t need to look like a show home when you have a new baby in the house; focus on soaking up these baby days while you can.
7. Slowing down
Modern motherhood occurs in a fast-paced world. We are told to be quick, efficient and productive, but these things aren’t conducive to a happy maternal experience. What you and your baby need is to slow down, focus on the little things, and simply breathe.
Introducing contact naps is a simple way to slow down, take some time for yourself and acknowledge the value of your role as a mother. You don’t need to be running a side hustle or cleaning the bathroom; motherhood holds value.
8. Skin-to-skin contact
You can use your baby’s contact nap as an opportunity for skin-to-skin. Strip your baby down to his diaper and place a blanket over both of you, to keep you warm. Skin contact aids breastfeeding, encourages bonding and helps babies to regulate their body temperature. Skin-to-skin touch promotes healthy development and growth and can reduce stress for both the mother and baby.
Being skin-to-skin also releases oxytocin in infants and their parents. Oxytocin is known as the ‘love hormone’ because it encourages bonding, which is why hospitals encourage close skin contact soon after birth. Contact naps are a fantastic way to incorporate skin-to-skin contact into your daily routine. Snuggle up under a blanket and catch up with your favorite TV show while your baby snoozes.
A 2017 study into the impact of skin-to-skin contact on full-term infants found many benefits, including improved mental and physical health for mothers, better breastfeeding rates, and better infant growth and development.
9. Safer sleep
All parents are told that babies should sleep in the same room as their mothers for the first six months of life; not many realize this rule also applies to daytime sleeping. You should be in the same room as your baby when he’s asleep to make sure he is safe. Contact naps are ideal for this because they keep your baby close.
According to a 2006 study published in the International Journal of Epidemiology:
‘SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) can happen at any time of the day and relatively quickly. Parents must be aware that placing infants supine and keeping them under supervision is equally important for daytime sleep‘.
10. Promotes breastfeeding
For breastfeeding moms, contact naps can help. Physical contact with your baby can stimulate milk production and give you more opportunities to learn your baby’s early feeding cues. The suckling motion of the baby at the breast during naptime helps stimulate milk production.
A 2022 study found that one hour of skin-to-skin contact for the first five weeks of life increased the rate of exclusive breastfeeding and the duration of breastfeeding. Since the benefits of breastfeeding are so bountiful, an hour of skin-to-skin is an excellent step to take towards a positive breastfeeding experience.
Is contact napping bad?
No, contact naps are not bad. Although some mothers might worry that contact napping could create bad sleep habits, research clearly shows that the benefits of contact napping, when done properly, far outweigh any potential risks. As long as the mother and baby are in a safe sleep environment and a safe position, contact napping is a nurturing, connected way for your baby to sleep.
Although those of previous generations might warn you you’re making a rod for your own back, there is nothing wrong with contact napping. If contact napping works for you and your baby, you’ll benefit from the physical closeness and bonding time it allows.
Am I creating a bad habit by letting my baby sleep on me?
No, you’re certainly not creating a bad habit by enjoying some quality time with your little one. Just because you let your newborn contact nap doesn’t mean you’ll be held hostage as a sleep surface for the rest of your life. You can let your baby contact nap until you’re ready for him to stop, and then you can transition to napping alone. Alternatively, you can contact nap for the entire time; it’s totally up to you.
When transitioning your baby to crib napping, be sure to follow safe sleep guidelines. Place baby on his back on a firm mattress, free of loose bedding. Make sure you are also in a comfortable position and unlikely to fall asleep.
When done responsibly, contact napping is a natural and nurturing aspect of new motherhood that should be supported rather than feared.
Will contact naps ‘spoil’ my newborn?
No, you cannot spoil a newborn with too much love, affection and bonding. Contact naps are an excellent way to connect with your baby, boost your maternal confidence and get some much-needed rest time for yourself. Contact naps will not spoil your baby. Neither will breastfeeding on demand, reassuring your child when he’s sad, or showering him with affection.
You get to choose how you parent, so don’t let other people force their views on you. If contact napping works for you and your baby, ignore the nay-sayers and enjoy the benefits that contact naps allow.
What to do during contact naps
Contact naps require you to sit still and rest with your baby. You might feel unproductive or worry you should be doing other things, but contact naps are wonderful and should be protected. Rest is productive. Helping your baby develop healthy sleep habits is productive. Bonding with your infant is productive.
Forget the household chores and focus instead on mothering for a little while. That sometimes means lying still to help your sleeping baby regulate his heart rate and temperature. There’s nothing wrong with that. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking mothering amounts to doing nothing. Although the value of your work might not be visible to the naked eye, encouraging optimal development and healthy attachment in your infant is the most crucial job of all.
You could read a book, watch television, listen to a podcast, or read stories to your older child to pass the time. Using a sling keeps your hands free and gives you more freedom at naptime. Your baby will still enjoy all the benefits of napping on your chest, but you can leave the house and go for a walk.
An article published in Pediatrics warns that slings should not be used for routine sleep:
‘After nursing, the infant should be repositioned in the sling so that the head is up, is clear of fabric, and is not against the adult’s body or the sling’.
It’s essential to stay awake during contact naps with your baby. Falling asleep with your baby on a sofa could be dangerous, so you should only contact nap if you know you can stay awake. If you’re feeling exhausted, it’s safer to nap upstairs following the safe sleep guidelines; that way, you can both catch up on your sleep safely.
When should babies stop contact napping?
There is no ‘should’ here. As you know by now, each baby is unique and each family has different circumstances, values, and priorities that determine what works. Your baby should stop contact napping when you’re ready for him to stop. It might be because you want your arms free for other things during nap time when you return to work, or because your lifestyle dictates that crib or car naps are easier options.
