Hugs hon accepting it has to happen is hard. I found it to be, I actually had psych counselling to get through it to prepare for the birth of my 2nd child. She said every birth is different. I will try and help you through some things you mentioned and say that you can still have these things.

a) this is for your baby's safety, keep repeating this to yourself and for yours too.

b) Skin to skin - Is there a reason why you cant? with both my elective c/s i had skin to skin straight away and also with my 2nd elective c/s, I had baby in recovery with me and Bf straight away

c) some babies who are born vaginally still need to have their noses / lungs suctioned.

d) Colostrum - I had it straight away even before the c/section mine wasnt kickstarted by labour, you may have it before hand especially if its not your first baby?

e) The lifting of your first child worried me too , you can still have cuddles and hugs kisses etc, just sit on the sofa first and they can stand and hug you. Yes you are unable to carry him for at least 3 weeks though as well as some other things you cant /shouldnt do like laundry etc. Also when your Ds comes visits you to meet the baby, give all attention to him and say hello and whatever you like to say and give him a present from the baby. When he is settled by seeing you again then introduce him to baby. Dont hold the baby when he comes to the room to see you the first time though after the baby is born, have the baby in the bassinet thing or with someone else, so it shows DS you are paying full attention to him it works so much better. Explain to DS what you are doing while feeding your baby, my girls found it facinating, also have a small box full of toys/boys/crayons/craft that come out only when u are feeing the baby so he has special things to play with at this time, it helps!

I dont think Ziggy is getting sloppy seconds, its just he needs to be born a different way, it will come down a lot to how you handle the situation, he wont receive any less love from you than you gave DS just a different entry into the world.

I was up and started to walking 24hours after the c/s, the sooner you walk the faster your recovery, it does hurt so much though that first walk but you get through it the midwives will help you through it.

Here are both my elective c/section stories I hope they help you hon, especially read my Tara's birth story as thats the one I had counselling for.

Taras birth story https://www.bellybelly.com.au/forums...ll-born-75023/
Annabels birth story - cant find it will try again to find just feeding atm

Honestly i was beside myself with anxiety for Annabels birth just recently (6 months ago) but excitement overtook at the last minute!

If you want to talk about anything pm me