Wow, firstly I would like to say how terrific you all are as - WOMEN!!

I completely understand where all of are coming from.

I have had two c-sections. My first for Placenta previa, I guess I felt 'robbed' of my oppurtunity to give birth naturally. Especially as I was so 'into' my pregnancy and writing a birth plan etc, etc. I didn't get to hold or meet bubs until 1.5 hours after the birth. I didn't even know what she looked like as I was crying when they showed me to her. I HATED the second day, being stuck with cords and lines going in and out. I demanded to be let free but the mw took hours. They wheeled her into my room without removing everything so when she cried I couldn't get to her!! It would take them 15 minutes or more to respond to the buzzer. I felt like it was holding me back from being a good mum. To top it off this horrible mw scolded me for her dirty nappy. I couldn't get out of bed to change it because of all the paraphenalia attached to me! Ugh!

Birth to me was a womanly mystery that I so wanted to experience. I guess it wasn't to be.... I was able to breastfeed though and that really helped me through. I always thought that the next time would be different.

My second, I was all motivated to go natural - even got up to 8cm on my epi-no. My ob was a little concerned about my scar rupturing (I thought I was smart by going private this time). I rang him in tears one night as I was frightened about it. He told me the 'safest thing for you to do is to have another ceasarean' He booked me in the very next day. DS wouldn't breastfeed - but I made him! LOL No way was he getting out of that arrangement!

I always regret not going for my VBAC. If you have the chance do it! Better to try than live in regret.

I am planning to have our third in a couple of years. THIS time I WILL do it
I will hire private midwife, I will find a vbac friendly ob and hospital. I will do it!!

What really gets my goat is when people drop comments like 'too posh to push'. Ceasers are the 'easy' way out. And say things to me like "Having a natural birth isn't all it's cracked up to be you know!"

Thanks for healing thread!

I just wanted to hold them for the first time when their arms were reaching out for their mummy. I wanted to see them open their eyes for the first time. I wanted to feel their skin on mine when they were born. All the pain in the world would be worth it to have those memories....

On a lighter note, I found Breastfeeding in the bath really helped with connecting and bonding. Something about the warm water, the skin on skin.

Sorry for the rambling and the looooong post!

It's wonderful to tell people who understand